How many of you have ever made a dumb dec.?
Important Point: One thing we ALL have in COMMON is that
we’ve all done some pretty DUMB stuff
(tongue on cold pipe - relationships - money - cars you never should have bought) - we all have stories, we all have these chapters in our lives we wish we could re-write.
So last week we looked at the greatest dec. maker of all time, Jesus and we discovered the 1st place for us to start is bible.
When making decisions, the first question to ask:
WHAT DOES THE BIBLE HAVE TO SAY?
now there’s a 2nd ? to ask - this ? you’ve probably heard b4
I believe we could ask this ? to every layer of our lives - in every opportunity, this ? would help us in our marriages,
in every rela., in the way we parent our kids, in the way we handle our money,
... our morality - this ? has the potential to send us down the path of tremendous success - and the ? is not what is the right thing to do, the moral... the permissible thing... the culturally acceptable thing to do - it is the ? my parents and yours too maybe would ask me all the time
When making decisions, the second question to ask:
WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO?
here’s 3 more layers to the ? - to make us dig a little deeper
In light of my PAST EXPERIENCES,
what is the wise thing for me to do?
In light of my PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES,
what is the wise thing for me to do?
In light of MY FUTURE HOPES and DREAMS,
what is the wise thing for me to do?
So if we put that into context, let’s say relationally, financially, morally, who I date, where I date, where I go
In light of my PAST EXPERIENCES,
PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES, MY FUTURE HOPES and DREAMS, what is the wise thing for me to do?
You see God says, like here is the level He’d like me to live - it’s not a level of simply what’s legal - we need to understand that - it’s not what is culturally permissible, it’s not just, what is allowable out there - God’s ? is the same ? my parents would ask me as a child - WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO?
I do like adding the other 3 layers ^
b/c it makes us have to think - that is where what we talked about last week, when people say, Oh let your conscience be your guide” - we said sure if it’s saturated in the truth - this is how that comes into play - WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO?
People have always asked the ? what does the Bible say about this or that - b/c in searching you may not find a direct answer to that. So right away you can see the hard-drive of their mind working, thinking, “well if God is not against it, He must be for it” right?
So the temptation for us then is to ? where’s the line?
between right and wrong, moral and immoral
so the tendency becomes, how close can I get to the fire w/out being burned, w/out facing the consequences - the ? ought not to be what can i get away with, not what is right or wrong, but what so many of our parents drilled into our heads - WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO? for me to do - not everybody else out there - jump off a cliff?
It’s different than trying to find if there is a verse in scripture that is against it, or where is the line, how far can i go?
b/c what we’ll find if we really search thru scrip. we will find a direction to head in that leads us to ask then WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO?
for example - drinking/sex
So what happens is it causes us to think right, that’s why we’re doing this series, b/c I want you to have think b/c so much of life falls into that gray area
People have different responses... I’m fine, it’s all good, Im not an alcoholic, I’m not gonna get in trouble, you sound like my over-reactive parent, another is... “ I understand what you’re talking about, and I'm old enough to know what to do, the difference between right and wrong and I don’t care, I’m gonna do what I want to do. I know the conseq. and I don’t care, I’m gonna do what I want to do. another is... “ahhh, you are so narrow minded and people like you are dangerous to this country
b/c you wanna impose you ideology and agenda upon us, you’re pathetic”
In this book, the Bible it gives us the descriptions of these 3 individuals - so that’s what we’re gonna look at today.
the Naive, the Fool, and the Mocker
Kinds of People:
First: The NAÏVE
If you’re naive you don’t admit it - never met anyone who said, “you know problem is, I’m just naive” nobody ever does that, b/c by the time you figure it out you’re not anymore right?
This is kinda tough to talk about b/c if you’re younger, jr. high, high school it sounds like an insult for somebody to say you’re naive. It’s not an insult - why?
Principle of Life: EVERYONE COMES into this world naïve
The naïve person lacks experience so they think they can
FIGURE OUT life on their own!
You can only have so much experience by the time your 14 or 15 or 18 right? It’s not a putdown, it sounds like a personal slam, but it’s not
But since the naive lack experience, they think they can figure life out on their own - have you ever been there?
B/c they’ve never seen any evidence to the contrary other than mom and dad saying, “you better listen, when I was your age”
Open to Proverbs 7 - what you’ll see is there is this wise person
standing at a window looking out & they see a naive person walking down the street, & they know the direction the naive person is heading - they’re walking to the part of town where the prostitutes come out at nite
“At the window of my house I looked out through the lattice. I saw among the simple, I noticed among the young men, a youth who lacked judgment.” Proverbs 7:6-7
“He was going down the street near her corner, walking along in the direction of her house.” Proverbs 7:8
“All at once he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter…” Proverbs 7:22
Remember: At certain stages of our lives, we lack
EXPERIENCE therefore we lack JUDGMENT
This is why young college students get so many credit card apps - why? - b/c they are naive, an 18 or 20yr. has never woke up 1 morning buried in 15, 18, 20,000 dollars of cc debt.
they’ve never exper. that - they don’t know what it means to feel that kind of bondage and pressure and the cc companies know that - so they reward them w/ the opportunity to ruin their lives financially - why? b/c they know they’ll take advantage of b/c they’re naive.
young ones smoking - their peers are fine with it for the most part - but you never see an adult, my age saying, “WOW! that kid is sooo coool - he’s smoking!” - ahhh so naive
if you’re 14, 15, 16, you’ve never coughed up a lung, you’ve never heard your doctor say, the lung cancer is taking over
Our naiveté causes us not to LISTEN
But the solution is to ask what’s wise? and to trust in God and Word
Second: The FOOL
The fool says, I know the DIFFERENCE between right and
wrong, but frankly I just don’t CARE
Some1 may say to the fool, “do you realize if you keep up that way it could really damage you marriage... or if you keep carrying on that way in your finances that things are gonna get bad”
Yeah I thought about but I really don’t care, besides I’ll deal w/that later - look at what the bible says
“A fool finds pleasure in evil conduct, but a man of understanding delights in wisdom.” Proverbs 10:23
“As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.” Proverbs 26:11
Ever see a dog return to it’s vomit (Here I have a video for you - just kidding)
They do the same thing over and over and over again - and they know there’s conseq.
There’s no new info. to a fool, it’s always,” i know, i know, i know
then why aren’t you concerned? b/c I just don’t give a rip, I don’t care & they may not verbally say that, but their actions prove it.
and you know what the bible says is the only way a fool changes? is they hit bottom
If you try to correct a fool, they will IGNORE you
Remember: The only way a fool changes is to face the
FULL consequences of their decisions
warnings don’t work, threats don’t work - it’s only when the wheels come off - it’s only when they hit hard enough they say, “OK I’ve had it” - WHY? b/c the fool has to learn.... the hard way
can I just tell you that here at FOCUS* it’s our heart to love, accept, and forgive - regardless - that’s our heart.
“…a companion of fools suffers harm.” Proverbs 13:20
We talked about this last week, our dec. affect those around us -
here’s scrip. showing us that - here the fool says, “Oh it only affects me, it doesn’t matter” - but it does matter. The bible tells us those close to you feel the brunt of your dec. and choices.
Many of you already know that b/c you’ve exper. it (my home)
Third: The MOCKER
The Mocker knows the difference between right and wrong and chooses to do what they want to do, but unlike the fool,
they have chosen to be CRITICAL of those choosing and doing right things!
If you try to correct a mocker, they will HATE you!
They’ll criticize you, make of fun of your stance, ridicule you
They just sorta sit in judgement of everyone else
(often we want to just blast right back don’t we?)
So when we even loving try to talk to them, they don’t want any part of it
We’ve all seen this haven’t we? All 3 of these - maybe, just maybe we have displayed some of one of these in our lives.
BIBLE
So... WHAT IS THE WISE THING TO DO?
“Wisdom calls aloud in the street, she raises her voice in the public squares; at the head of the noisy streets she cries out, in the gateways of the city she makes her speech: ‘How long will you simple ones love your simple ways? How long will mockers delight in mockery and fools hate knowledge? If you had responded to my rebuke, I would have poured out my heart to you and made my thoughts known to you.
But since you rejected me when I called and no one gave heed when I stretched out my hand, since you ignored all my advice and would not accept my rebuke... the waywardness of the simple will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy
them; but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm.’” Proverbs 1:20-33
(hands) How many of you would like to live in safety, be at ease, and w/out fear of harm?
Two Questions:
Question #1: Where are you SITTING today?
It may not be in every area of life
This series is all about a 4th place - that is the seat of wisdom
Question #2: In light of my past experiences, in light of my
present conditions and circumstances and in light of my future
hopes and dreams…Which SEAT do you want to SIT in?
I know what all of you are thinking?
Remembering God can work thru our “If only’s”
So we ask... What does the Bible have to say? and in the gray...
In light of my PAST EXPERIENCES,
PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES, MY FUTURE HOPES
and DREAMS, what is the wise thing for me to do?
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Gray Matter - "What was I Thinking?"
What was I Thinking?
People do stupid things. We watch a video like that and laugh and say to ourselves or out loud, “How incredibly stupid these people are.”
I was thinking, wouldn’t this be intriguing to do if we started maybe in the back and went around to each table, person by person and we all shared the dumbest thing we’ve ever done.
I’d imagine there’d be a few stories there. Some money we wish we wouldn’t have spent, relationships we wish we wouldn’t have gotten into, deals we wish we would have never done, investments maybe? we wish we would never taken a part of, partnerships you never entered into - oh, how about dates you wish you never gone out on, how about invitations you wish you never would have received?
I think all of us can look back, in some cases for some of us it was a night, for some it was a weekend, for some it was several months - others, entire yrs. we wish we could go back and re-write chapters of our lives - choices and decisions we’d like to have a “do-over” on, right?
So here’s the premise of this series we’re kicking off
Here’s The Key Idea of This Series:
Life is ALL about DECISIONS/CHOICES
Stop and think about all the relationships, money, deals, the choices - It’s now obvious to us how stupid we were. We look at that now and say to ourselves, “How could I have been so dumb” It’s obvious to us now that some of those decisions fall into “What was I thinking” dumb dec. and now...
we run into people going down that dumb road, be it a child, friend, whoever and you’re saying, “you don’t want to go there brother”
When we are presented in life a series of choices and we chose to look at them wisely, make wise dec. we get the most out of life - those who don’t take that approach, the chances are in this world we live in, we stand to suffer some pretty sever consequences
As we start this series today and what we’re going to look at over the next few weeks we’re going to talk about how to become great dec. makers
B/c you and I both know life is all about choices and dec.
So right off the bat let’s lay down some foundation
Key Foundational Points:
• We are all the SUM TOTAL of the choices we make!
• Our decisions determine our DESTINY.
I think we can all look back at a series of choices and dumb dec.
we’ve made and say, What was I Thinking?
I know i can - (buying thunderbird in Cal.)
My idea behind this series is that I’d like all of us to make a
commitment to making great dec.
We have this privilege given to us by God to make dec. it’s God given, to reason, ponder, wager, rationalize
animals can’t do that like humans can and the reason we’re diff. b/c we as people were made in the image of God and God is a great dec. maker and He wants us all to be great dec. makers.
and... dec. making is not an event, we need to all realize that,
dec. making is a process that is followed by an event - so when we view it as an event that’s what gets us into trouble so many times and we spend days, weeks, months dog paddling in the pools of regret - so how do we make wise dec?
There is a diff. between the big dec. in life and the little ones but they also inter-connect
We all face these big, huge dec. right?
I think 2 of the biggest dec. we’ll ever make in life are: who’s your master? Who’s your mate? those are big dec
but there are also the little dec. we make daily, everyday
You see the little dec. we make daily, where you work, who you hang out with, where you spend your time, what you spend your time doing... who you spend... what u watch... listen to...those little dec when they collect lead to big issues
When I was younger I was a sports freak - i loved and played everything and in HS I was a pretty good basketball player - good enough to get invites to schools but not good enough to get any scholarships to these schools therfore it ended there.
Sometimes I’d see these BB camps for adults to go and learn the game from these superstars like Magic, MJ and so forth and you learn the intricacies of the game and work-out hard and only eat grapefruit or something... but I’d think, “Oh I’d love that - to learn from the best”
There’s something about us that wants to learn from the best
If you have a child who could sing or play and instrument wouldn’t it be cool if you could pick up the phone and have like Sting or Harry Connick Jr. or someone like that teach your child? Or if you love golf, if you get sit and learn from Tiger Woods? Hang out for a couple of days and just twik your game?
That would be really cool
So here’s what we’re going to do today, we’re going to learn from the greatest dec. maker of all time - we’re gonna learn from someone who never made a bad call, someone who never over-reacted, some1 who never said anything they regretted, some1 who never got carried away by their feelings - you know who I’m talkin about - ? - Jesus, our perfect role model.
I don’t know if you know this but as Jesus grew up He was a Carpenter, but the last 36 mo. of His life He was a traveling preacher - the bible tells us that a guy named John baptized Him into what we would call ministry, and after He was baptized the bible tells us He went off into the wilderness. He didn’t ride in an H2 or 4x4, He walked - now I’ve never been there to that area but I read about it and it’s a desert w/ this huge towering mounds it’s a tough area to live for 40 days and nites that would be tough in & of itself, but the bible tells us that jesus fasted the entire time- he went w/out food
How many of you have ever fasted for 1 day? 3 days? 1 week?
ever go 40 days?
He was emotionally, physically, spiritually drained and the Devil comes along and gives Jesus a series of choices and dec - the Devil comes up w/ these dec to throw Jesus off track, off His purpose... listen to settle... He wanted to Jesus to make a dumb, what was I thinking dec.
So let’s try to picture this scenario... Jesus hadn’t eaten in 40 days, 40 nites and the Devil says, look at those rocks, don’t you think those rocks look like big beautiful loaves of bread - there’s nothing like bread, carbs... when you’re hungry - so he says Jesus why don’t you snap your fingers and turn those rocks into a loaf of Wonder bread - look at what Jesus said,
“But Jesus told him (Satan), ‘No! The Scriptures say, ‘People
need more than bread for their life; they must feed on every
word of God.’” Matthew 4:4 - ok then look what Satan says next
Hey throw yourself down from this high place, you’re not gonna die, people will see this miracle and they’ll follow you, it’d be better than David Blain - so what would Jesus do w/ that kind of dec?
“Jesus responded, ‘The Scriptures also say, ‘Do not test the
Lord your God.’” Matthew 4:7
So the Devil turned up the heat a bit, tried to sweeten the pot, which by the way is what happens to us alot when we’re put in situations of compromising dec. making
The Devil says, Jesus bow down and worship me and I’ll give you everything (which is kinda silly when you think about it, what can you give Jesus, the creator of all things? but remember the drained state Jesus is in and.... once again... He is our perfect model knowing we will face these kind of tough decisions in life)
So what did Jesus say,
“’Get out of here, Satan,’ Jesus told him. ‘For the Scriptures
say, ‘You must worship the Lord your God; serve only him.’”
Matthew 4:10
Now there was a common phrase used in each circumstance, did you catch that? what was it
‘For the Scriptures say,
so what is the 1st question we should ask facing any dec?
The First Question to Ask with Any and All Decisions and/or Choices in Life
What DOES THE BIBLE have to say?
Jesus went 3 for 3 - it’s the 1st ever recorded threepeat
‘For the Scriptures say,(3)
What was goin on? How did Jesus make the dec. He asked Himself a very simple ? what does the bible say?
If it’s in this book, then I got a green light and i’ll go for it, if it’s not then it’s a red light I’m not gonna go there.
In all the dec. we make, the big and the little where’s the 1st place to start? what does the bible have to say about this.
You know I have talked to a # people over the yrs. and heard their tough stories - so many of them start w/ “If only...”
If only... I had said No to that relationship ...hadn’t said that to my spouse or son or daughter ... I hadn’t put my money in that ... hadn’t been so greedy, so stubborn ... so selfish - If only (3)
Now here’s an amazing thing about God - He can work thru your “If only’s” and He can use your past as leverage to help you in the future - to make wise great dec. that’ll give you a wonderful future - Jer. 29:11
So the 1st place to start is asking and answering what does the bible have to say? This is what jesus modeled.
God wrote a book. It’s a love letter to all of us and... He put His counsel down on these pages for a # of reasons - let me share just a couple w/ you -
God’s heart in giving us His Word:
• So we can have the BEST LIFE POSSIBLE
So we can discover God has an awesome plan for our lives.
We would be amazed at how great our dec. can be, both big & little - by just spending time in this book.
• Because God wants to help us HELP OURSELVES & OTHERS
He wants us to make great dec. not only for our own benefit but to also help and influence others... influence others
b/c for us to think ‘my dec really don’t affect other people, they really don’t, you just have to do what’s right by you’ - you are sadly mistaken with that thought process - b/c our dec. do affect others - we are connected. Especially those close to you, family, children, sister, brother, nephew, niece, friends, co-workers are looking at your life and dec.
• Because God wants us to make the MOST OF OUR TIME
Think about this, time is a gift from God that we can’t go back and get some more of & the older I get the more I wonder where did all the time go? As I watch my girls grow up - all the more reason to make wise dec. Let me ask... hands
How many of you have wasted a certain amount of time in your life, whole periods, weeks, months, possibly yrs. of your life b/c of dumb dec. & choices?
So if I will look to God’s Word to make dec. I’ll see He has my best interest at heart, for the best life possible, to not only kelp me, but others - to make good use of my time for what’s really important.
But you know not everybody takes that approach, not only in dec. making but life in gen. - they don’t have a certain set of standards, just kinda fall into relativism - “if it works for me it works, it may not work for you, but hey, that’s OK - no need for any absolutes b/c my standards may be diff. than yours”
(Prof. at Univ. hands test w/ series of ?’s and answers - just circle the answer you feel is right, there’s no right or wrongs just what you want - you’d be thinking what’s he smokin? - what kind of test is this? a standardless, baseless test it’s useless)
So when we don’t use God’s Word or Him as our absolute then everything becomes relative, everything sorta slides on scale and if I make dec. that way I get messed up pretty quickly
and the reason why so many make dumb, what was I thinking dec. is b/c we look to ourselves instead of God - like
what are some of the things we have said when we go w/ ourselves, things we’ve said a time or 2
The Basis of “What was I thinking?” Dumb Decisions
• “Go with YOUR HEART”
Yeah you’ll bat a thousand doing that wont ya - right 100%?
• “Let your CONSCIENCE be your GUIDE”
but what peeks your consc. may not peek mine so it’s the sliding scale - your consc is important in dec. making when it’s saturated in the Truth - it’s gotta be tied into that
• “If it FEELS RIGHT”
Hey, I didn’t feel like getting out of bed this morning
or some1 may say I don’t feel like loving you anymore - our feelings are fickle (Cathleen story) we cannot trust our feelings
they’re to up and down - sometimes I don’t feel like going to work... school.... reading this book... or praying
• “What you do in the PRIVACY of your OWN HOME is your own business.”
Sure I can agree w/ that to a certain extent but we need to know this - private dec. always go public - so often what’s made in private has personal ramifications - b/c people carry out their lives and live in public - so whatever dec. made in private, remember, affect and influence those around us, sometimes
directly, sometimes indirectly. - base them on the truth.
So the 1st question everybody needs to ask themselves before making a dec. is.... What does the Bible say?
How much better would life be? We wouldn’t be wallowing in self-pity or the pools of regret if we just asked... what
1 problem with this is not everything is so black and white is it?
So what do you do w/ the other 15-20% - what I’ve found and have done myself is ask the ? - how close can I get to this and still not sin? b/c if I haven’t crossed over the line then it’s what?
OK? Is it? How far can i go w/out breaking the law? How close to immorality can i get w/out being immoral? How much can i stretch, how much can i bend w/out actually breaking any?
Is it legal... moral... permissible - and when we go down that line, oh.. that line is often oh so fuzzy - how close can i get w/out disaster - we need a standard, if it’s not illegal, then it must be...
OK - how far is too far? So in these gray areas are there other ?’s we need to ask? I think there are, but you’ll have to come back next week.
People do stupid things. We watch a video like that and laugh and say to ourselves or out loud, “How incredibly stupid these people are.”
I was thinking, wouldn’t this be intriguing to do if we started maybe in the back and went around to each table, person by person and we all shared the dumbest thing we’ve ever done.
I’d imagine there’d be a few stories there. Some money we wish we wouldn’t have spent, relationships we wish we wouldn’t have gotten into, deals we wish we would have never done, investments maybe? we wish we would never taken a part of, partnerships you never entered into - oh, how about dates you wish you never gone out on, how about invitations you wish you never would have received?
I think all of us can look back, in some cases for some of us it was a night, for some it was a weekend, for some it was several months - others, entire yrs. we wish we could go back and re-write chapters of our lives - choices and decisions we’d like to have a “do-over” on, right?
So here’s the premise of this series we’re kicking off
Here’s The Key Idea of This Series:
Life is ALL about DECISIONS/CHOICES
Stop and think about all the relationships, money, deals, the choices - It’s now obvious to us how stupid we were. We look at that now and say to ourselves, “How could I have been so dumb” It’s obvious to us now that some of those decisions fall into “What was I thinking” dumb dec. and now...
we run into people going down that dumb road, be it a child, friend, whoever and you’re saying, “you don’t want to go there brother”
When we are presented in life a series of choices and we chose to look at them wisely, make wise dec. we get the most out of life - those who don’t take that approach, the chances are in this world we live in, we stand to suffer some pretty sever consequences
As we start this series today and what we’re going to look at over the next few weeks we’re going to talk about how to become great dec. makers
B/c you and I both know life is all about choices and dec.
So right off the bat let’s lay down some foundation
Key Foundational Points:
• We are all the SUM TOTAL of the choices we make!
• Our decisions determine our DESTINY.
I think we can all look back at a series of choices and dumb dec.
we’ve made and say, What was I Thinking?
I know i can - (buying thunderbird in Cal.)
My idea behind this series is that I’d like all of us to make a
commitment to making great dec.
We have this privilege given to us by God to make dec. it’s God given, to reason, ponder, wager, rationalize
animals can’t do that like humans can and the reason we’re diff. b/c we as people were made in the image of God and God is a great dec. maker and He wants us all to be great dec. makers.
and... dec. making is not an event, we need to all realize that,
dec. making is a process that is followed by an event - so when we view it as an event that’s what gets us into trouble so many times and we spend days, weeks, months dog paddling in the pools of regret - so how do we make wise dec?
There is a diff. between the big dec. in life and the little ones but they also inter-connect
We all face these big, huge dec. right?
I think 2 of the biggest dec. we’ll ever make in life are: who’s your master? Who’s your mate? those are big dec
but there are also the little dec. we make daily, everyday
You see the little dec. we make daily, where you work, who you hang out with, where you spend your time, what you spend your time doing... who you spend... what u watch... listen to...those little dec when they collect lead to big issues
When I was younger I was a sports freak - i loved and played everything and in HS I was a pretty good basketball player - good enough to get invites to schools but not good enough to get any scholarships to these schools therfore it ended there.
Sometimes I’d see these BB camps for adults to go and learn the game from these superstars like Magic, MJ and so forth and you learn the intricacies of the game and work-out hard and only eat grapefruit or something... but I’d think, “Oh I’d love that - to learn from the best”
There’s something about us that wants to learn from the best
If you have a child who could sing or play and instrument wouldn’t it be cool if you could pick up the phone and have like Sting or Harry Connick Jr. or someone like that teach your child? Or if you love golf, if you get sit and learn from Tiger Woods? Hang out for a couple of days and just twik your game?
That would be really cool
So here’s what we’re going to do today, we’re going to learn from the greatest dec. maker of all time - we’re gonna learn from someone who never made a bad call, someone who never over-reacted, some1 who never said anything they regretted, some1 who never got carried away by their feelings - you know who I’m talkin about - ? - Jesus, our perfect role model.
I don’t know if you know this but as Jesus grew up He was a Carpenter, but the last 36 mo. of His life He was a traveling preacher - the bible tells us that a guy named John baptized Him into what we would call ministry, and after He was baptized the bible tells us He went off into the wilderness. He didn’t ride in an H2 or 4x4, He walked - now I’ve never been there to that area but I read about it and it’s a desert w/ this huge towering mounds it’s a tough area to live for 40 days and nites that would be tough in & of itself, but the bible tells us that jesus fasted the entire time- he went w/out food
How many of you have ever fasted for 1 day? 3 days? 1 week?
ever go 40 days?
He was emotionally, physically, spiritually drained and the Devil comes along and gives Jesus a series of choices and dec - the Devil comes up w/ these dec to throw Jesus off track, off His purpose... listen to settle... He wanted to Jesus to make a dumb, what was I thinking dec.
So let’s try to picture this scenario... Jesus hadn’t eaten in 40 days, 40 nites and the Devil says, look at those rocks, don’t you think those rocks look like big beautiful loaves of bread - there’s nothing like bread, carbs... when you’re hungry - so he says Jesus why don’t you snap your fingers and turn those rocks into a loaf of Wonder bread - look at what Jesus said,
“But Jesus told him (Satan), ‘No! The Scriptures say, ‘People
need more than bread for their life; they must feed on every
word of God.’” Matthew 4:4 - ok then look what Satan says next
Hey throw yourself down from this high place, you’re not gonna die, people will see this miracle and they’ll follow you, it’d be better than David Blain - so what would Jesus do w/ that kind of dec?
“Jesus responded, ‘The Scriptures also say, ‘Do not test the
Lord your God.’” Matthew 4:7
So the Devil turned up the heat a bit, tried to sweeten the pot, which by the way is what happens to us alot when we’re put in situations of compromising dec. making
The Devil says, Jesus bow down and worship me and I’ll give you everything (which is kinda silly when you think about it, what can you give Jesus, the creator of all things? but remember the drained state Jesus is in and.... once again... He is our perfect model knowing we will face these kind of tough decisions in life)
So what did Jesus say,
“’Get out of here, Satan,’ Jesus told him. ‘For the Scriptures
say, ‘You must worship the Lord your God; serve only him.’”
Matthew 4:10
Now there was a common phrase used in each circumstance, did you catch that? what was it
‘For the Scriptures say,
so what is the 1st question we should ask facing any dec?
The First Question to Ask with Any and All Decisions and/or Choices in Life
What DOES THE BIBLE have to say?
Jesus went 3 for 3 - it’s the 1st ever recorded threepeat
‘For the Scriptures say,(3)
What was goin on? How did Jesus make the dec. He asked Himself a very simple ? what does the bible say?
If it’s in this book, then I got a green light and i’ll go for it, if it’s not then it’s a red light I’m not gonna go there.
In all the dec. we make, the big and the little where’s the 1st place to start? what does the bible have to say about this.
You know I have talked to a # people over the yrs. and heard their tough stories - so many of them start w/ “If only...”
If only... I had said No to that relationship ...hadn’t said that to my spouse or son or daughter ... I hadn’t put my money in that ... hadn’t been so greedy, so stubborn ... so selfish - If only (3)
Now here’s an amazing thing about God - He can work thru your “If only’s” and He can use your past as leverage to help you in the future - to make wise great dec. that’ll give you a wonderful future - Jer. 29:11
So the 1st place to start is asking and answering what does the bible have to say? This is what jesus modeled.
God wrote a book. It’s a love letter to all of us and... He put His counsel down on these pages for a # of reasons - let me share just a couple w/ you -
God’s heart in giving us His Word:
• So we can have the BEST LIFE POSSIBLE
So we can discover God has an awesome plan for our lives.
We would be amazed at how great our dec. can be, both big & little - by just spending time in this book.
• Because God wants to help us HELP OURSELVES & OTHERS
He wants us to make great dec. not only for our own benefit but to also help and influence others... influence others
b/c for us to think ‘my dec really don’t affect other people, they really don’t, you just have to do what’s right by you’ - you are sadly mistaken with that thought process - b/c our dec. do affect others - we are connected. Especially those close to you, family, children, sister, brother, nephew, niece, friends, co-workers are looking at your life and dec.
• Because God wants us to make the MOST OF OUR TIME
Think about this, time is a gift from God that we can’t go back and get some more of & the older I get the more I wonder where did all the time go? As I watch my girls grow up - all the more reason to make wise dec. Let me ask... hands
How many of you have wasted a certain amount of time in your life, whole periods, weeks, months, possibly yrs. of your life b/c of dumb dec. & choices?
So if I will look to God’s Word to make dec. I’ll see He has my best interest at heart, for the best life possible, to not only kelp me, but others - to make good use of my time for what’s really important.
But you know not everybody takes that approach, not only in dec. making but life in gen. - they don’t have a certain set of standards, just kinda fall into relativism - “if it works for me it works, it may not work for you, but hey, that’s OK - no need for any absolutes b/c my standards may be diff. than yours”
(Prof. at Univ. hands test w/ series of ?’s and answers - just circle the answer you feel is right, there’s no right or wrongs just what you want - you’d be thinking what’s he smokin? - what kind of test is this? a standardless, baseless test it’s useless)
So when we don’t use God’s Word or Him as our absolute then everything becomes relative, everything sorta slides on scale and if I make dec. that way I get messed up pretty quickly
and the reason why so many make dumb, what was I thinking dec. is b/c we look to ourselves instead of God - like
what are some of the things we have said when we go w/ ourselves, things we’ve said a time or 2
The Basis of “What was I thinking?” Dumb Decisions
• “Go with YOUR HEART”
Yeah you’ll bat a thousand doing that wont ya - right 100%?
• “Let your CONSCIENCE be your GUIDE”
but what peeks your consc. may not peek mine so it’s the sliding scale - your consc is important in dec. making when it’s saturated in the Truth - it’s gotta be tied into that
• “If it FEELS RIGHT”
Hey, I didn’t feel like getting out of bed this morning
or some1 may say I don’t feel like loving you anymore - our feelings are fickle (Cathleen story) we cannot trust our feelings
they’re to up and down - sometimes I don’t feel like going to work... school.... reading this book... or praying
• “What you do in the PRIVACY of your OWN HOME is your own business.”
Sure I can agree w/ that to a certain extent but we need to know this - private dec. always go public - so often what’s made in private has personal ramifications - b/c people carry out their lives and live in public - so whatever dec. made in private, remember, affect and influence those around us, sometimes
directly, sometimes indirectly. - base them on the truth.
So the 1st question everybody needs to ask themselves before making a dec. is.... What does the Bible say?
How much better would life be? We wouldn’t be wallowing in self-pity or the pools of regret if we just asked... what
1 problem with this is not everything is so black and white is it?
So what do you do w/ the other 15-20% - what I’ve found and have done myself is ask the ? - how close can I get to this and still not sin? b/c if I haven’t crossed over the line then it’s what?
OK? Is it? How far can i go w/out breaking the law? How close to immorality can i get w/out being immoral? How much can i stretch, how much can i bend w/out actually breaking any?
Is it legal... moral... permissible - and when we go down that line, oh.. that line is often oh so fuzzy - how close can i get w/out disaster - we need a standard, if it’s not illegal, then it must be...
OK - how far is too far? So in these gray areas are there other ?’s we need to ask? I think there are, but you’ll have to come back next week.
Friday, February 16, 2007
Living Above Marital Conflict
Glorifying God in Marital Conflict
In order to resolve conflict biblically, commit first to dealing with conflict in a way that brings glory to God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God... let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:9,16
Glorifying God in Marital Conflict
A. The glory of God in marriage
“...whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” 1 Cor. 10:31
1. What is God’s glory? The _display__ or_manifestation_ of the perfection and excellency of _God’s character and
attributes_.
ask: What are some character traits and attributes of God?
(kind, merciful, forgiving, accepting, loving)
2. How does God intend for marriage to display His Glory_?
God intends the husband and wife relationship to glorify Him through the lifelong, day-by-day display of sacrificial servant-like
love of Christ for the Church.
Dennis Rainey
3. How can I please and honor God in the midst of _conflict_ in my marriage?
a) The first step is to _understand why God created marriage__.
Marriage exists to magnify the truth and worth and beauty and greatness of God. - John Piper
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Gen. 1:27
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. Gen. 2:24
(this is huge to understand the ideal of oneness - in marriage we are no longer on our own - we are one.
How do the relationships that we are involved in grow?
In Sacrifice.
We turn away from our own selfish wants and desires and we sacrifice what we may want to do, or where to go, or where not to go – WHY?
It is purely done out of love. - in sac. we grow together as 1)
The second step is to _understand how humanity’s fall into sin radically altered God’s intent for marriage.
Instead of oneness, couples experience:
Shame, guilt, and fear
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.
Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"
He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid." Gen. 3:7-10
Blame
The man said, "The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it." Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate." Gen. 3:12-13
(Adam didn’t stand a chance - nude woman offering food)
A battle for control
To the woman he said, "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you." Gen. 3:16
(when we lose sight of the fact that we are 1 - we begin to exper. these effects: shame, guilt, fear, the blame game game, and this batlle for control)
4. The _fall of man__ has defaced the image of God
(_His glory_) in marriage. (we must remember we are 1)
The glory of God and marital conflict
1. Every spouse sins__in his marriage and falls far short of the _glory_ God intends for marriage to display
(Romans 3:23). “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”
2. Through Jesus Christ_ and His victory on the cross__, God has given the resources_and _ability_ to live at peace with Him and each other.
(here today and you do not have a real rel. w/ J/C nows the time -maybe you haven’t fully accessed all God has to offer in Christ - maybe you’ve been trying to work this conflict on your own b/c you are a strong indiv. of strong character, but things are just not going the way you want - it’s not all rosy w/picket fences - God has the answer today)
God is saying, “I want in on your mess, let Me in on the mess”
a) Marital conflict provides _opportunity_ to glorify God by displaying_ His character and _ attributes__.
(God is telling us that stumbling blocks are actually stepping st)
b) Couples reflect__God’s glory__by being kind and tender-hearted _toward_one another, _forgiving_each other as God in Christ has forgiven them (Ephesians 4:32.)
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
We are mirrors
3. When marital conflict arises, a _peacemaker_in marriage will view the _conflict_ not as an accident, but as an _assignment__ to glorify God.
Summary:
Glorifying God in Marital Conflict
God created marriage to magnify His truth, worth, beauty, and greatness, and to reflect the glory of His character (including the attributes of love and forgiveness).
You can choose to respond to marital conflict in a way that will either honor or dishonor God. (Life is full of choices)
Glorifying God in marital conflict involves joyfully embracing the conflict as an assignment from God (James 1:2).
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,” (are we going to face conflict in marriage? - how will you respond?)
Action Point Suggestions:
Reflect on the impact of the fall of man on marriage relationships. Discuss with your spouse how these same factors have been a part of your marriage.
When conflict occurs, I will consciously ask myself, “How can I please and honor God in the midst of this conflict in my marriage?”
Memorize Ephesians 4:32, so that in the midst of conflict, you can remember to respond in a Christ-like manner.
Exposing the Idols in Our Hearts and Marriages
Application Project #1
INDIVIDUAL SECTION (25 minutes)
Setting:Stay together as a couple, but complete this section quickly without any interaction.
Objective:To identify any idols that may be the source of conflict in your marriage.
Read James 4:1-2, Exodus 20:4-5, and Psalm 115:4-8.
James 4:1-2 teaches that the source of conflict is my pleasures and desires. And we have learned that even good desires can become bad demands and that it is a short step from bad demands to idols. We also learned that these desires originate in our hearts and produce all sorts of marital conflicts.
Although we may not realize it, every time we choose anger, isolation, bitterness, unforgiveness, or any other response to marital conflict other than love and forgiveness from our hearts, we are choosing to worship an idol that never fulfills and always traps us in marital conflict (see Psalm 115:4-8). As the Bible says, all who worship idols shall become like them: deaf, mute, and dumb, without any power to fulfill or to deliver from the traps that conflict brings.
Think about the Scriptures you just read in light of one of your typical marital conflicts. Are there any desires that become demands that tend to rule your heart in the midst of your marital conflict?
After praying, ask yourself, “How can I glorify God by changing the way I respond to my spouse when conflict arises? What controlling desires (idols) must I deal with? Write down any insights you have.
Confess to God and claim His promise of forgiveness in Jesus Christ for any controlling desires (idols) He shows you (I John 1:9). Commit to change with the help of God’s Spirit and His Word. Humbly share with your spouse and agree to hold one another accountable.
Your marriage “exists to magnify the truth and worth and beauty and greatness of God”. Write down some steps you need to take in order for your marriage to serve this “magnifying” purpose (read Ephesians 5:22-33).
INTERACTION SECTION (35 minutes)
Setting: Stay together as a couple and complete this section with interaction.
Objective: To discuss the feelings, attitudes, and thoughts that each of you has on this subject.
Share with your spouse what you learned about any controlling desires that have caused conflict in your marriage.
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such (a word) as is good for edification according to the need (of the moment) so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:29-32
After reading these verses, spend time discussing ways to improve your communication in order to glorify God in your marriage by handling conflict as He prescribes.
Pray and then write down at least one action point you agree to take as a couple.
In order to resolve conflict biblically, commit first to dealing with conflict in a way that brings glory to God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God... let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven. Matthew 5:9,16
Glorifying God in Marital Conflict
A. The glory of God in marriage
“...whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” 1 Cor. 10:31
1. What is God’s glory? The _display__ or_manifestation_ of the perfection and excellency of _God’s character and
attributes_.
ask: What are some character traits and attributes of God?
(kind, merciful, forgiving, accepting, loving)
2. How does God intend for marriage to display His Glory_?
God intends the husband and wife relationship to glorify Him through the lifelong, day-by-day display of sacrificial servant-like
love of Christ for the Church.
Dennis Rainey
3. How can I please and honor God in the midst of _conflict_ in my marriage?
a) The first step is to _understand why God created marriage__.
Marriage exists to magnify the truth and worth and beauty and greatness of God. - John Piper
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. Gen. 1:27
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. Gen. 2:24
(this is huge to understand the ideal of oneness - in marriage we are no longer on our own - we are one.
How do the relationships that we are involved in grow?
In Sacrifice.
We turn away from our own selfish wants and desires and we sacrifice what we may want to do, or where to go, or where not to go – WHY?
It is purely done out of love. - in sac. we grow together as 1)
The second step is to _understand how humanity’s fall into sin radically altered God’s intent for marriage.
Instead of oneness, couples experience:
Shame, guilt, and fear
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.
Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"
He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid." Gen. 3:7-10
Blame
The man said, "The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it." Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?" The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate." Gen. 3:12-13
(Adam didn’t stand a chance - nude woman offering food)
A battle for control
To the woman he said, "I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you." Gen. 3:16
(when we lose sight of the fact that we are 1 - we begin to exper. these effects: shame, guilt, fear, the blame game game, and this batlle for control)
4. The _fall of man__ has defaced the image of God
(_His glory_) in marriage. (we must remember we are 1)
The glory of God and marital conflict
1. Every spouse sins__in his marriage and falls far short of the _glory_ God intends for marriage to display
(Romans 3:23). “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.”
2. Through Jesus Christ_ and His victory on the cross__, God has given the resources_and _ability_ to live at peace with Him and each other.
(here today and you do not have a real rel. w/ J/C nows the time -maybe you haven’t fully accessed all God has to offer in Christ - maybe you’ve been trying to work this conflict on your own b/c you are a strong indiv. of strong character, but things are just not going the way you want - it’s not all rosy w/picket fences - God has the answer today)
God is saying, “I want in on your mess, let Me in on the mess”
a) Marital conflict provides _opportunity_ to glorify God by displaying_ His character and _ attributes__.
(God is telling us that stumbling blocks are actually stepping st)
b) Couples reflect__God’s glory__by being kind and tender-hearted _toward_one another, _forgiving_each other as God in Christ has forgiven them (Ephesians 4:32.)
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
We are mirrors
3. When marital conflict arises, a _peacemaker_in marriage will view the _conflict_ not as an accident, but as an _assignment__ to glorify God.
Summary:
Glorifying God in Marital Conflict
God created marriage to magnify His truth, worth, beauty, and greatness, and to reflect the glory of His character (including the attributes of love and forgiveness).
You can choose to respond to marital conflict in a way that will either honor or dishonor God. (Life is full of choices)
Glorifying God in marital conflict involves joyfully embracing the conflict as an assignment from God (James 1:2).
“Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds,” (are we going to face conflict in marriage? - how will you respond?)
Action Point Suggestions:
Reflect on the impact of the fall of man on marriage relationships. Discuss with your spouse how these same factors have been a part of your marriage.
When conflict occurs, I will consciously ask myself, “How can I please and honor God in the midst of this conflict in my marriage?”
Memorize Ephesians 4:32, so that in the midst of conflict, you can remember to respond in a Christ-like manner.
Exposing the Idols in Our Hearts and Marriages
Application Project #1
INDIVIDUAL SECTION (25 minutes)
Setting:Stay together as a couple, but complete this section quickly without any interaction.
Objective:To identify any idols that may be the source of conflict in your marriage.
Read James 4:1-2, Exodus 20:4-5, and Psalm 115:4-8.
James 4:1-2 teaches that the source of conflict is my pleasures and desires. And we have learned that even good desires can become bad demands and that it is a short step from bad demands to idols. We also learned that these desires originate in our hearts and produce all sorts of marital conflicts.
Although we may not realize it, every time we choose anger, isolation, bitterness, unforgiveness, or any other response to marital conflict other than love and forgiveness from our hearts, we are choosing to worship an idol that never fulfills and always traps us in marital conflict (see Psalm 115:4-8). As the Bible says, all who worship idols shall become like them: deaf, mute, and dumb, without any power to fulfill or to deliver from the traps that conflict brings.
Think about the Scriptures you just read in light of one of your typical marital conflicts. Are there any desires that become demands that tend to rule your heart in the midst of your marital conflict?
After praying, ask yourself, “How can I glorify God by changing the way I respond to my spouse when conflict arises? What controlling desires (idols) must I deal with? Write down any insights you have.
Confess to God and claim His promise of forgiveness in Jesus Christ for any controlling desires (idols) He shows you (I John 1:9). Commit to change with the help of God’s Spirit and His Word. Humbly share with your spouse and agree to hold one another accountable.
Your marriage “exists to magnify the truth and worth and beauty and greatness of God”. Write down some steps you need to take in order for your marriage to serve this “magnifying” purpose (read Ephesians 5:22-33).
INTERACTION SECTION (35 minutes)
Setting: Stay together as a couple and complete this section with interaction.
Objective: To discuss the feelings, attitudes, and thoughts that each of you has on this subject.
Share with your spouse what you learned about any controlling desires that have caused conflict in your marriage.
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such (a word) as is good for edification according to the need (of the moment) so that it will give grace to those who hear. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.
Ephesians 4:29-32
After reading these verses, spend time discussing ways to improve your communication in order to glorify God in your marriage by handling conflict as He prescribes.
Pray and then write down at least one action point you agree to take as a couple.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
GETTING FOCUS* - "The FOCUS* Game Plan"
“For we know, brothers loved by God, that he has chosen you, because our gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord; in spite of severe suffering, you welcomed the message with the joy given by the Holy Spirit. And so you became a model to all the believers in Macedonia and Achaia. The Lord's message rang out from you not only in Macedonia and Achaia—your faith in God has become known everywhere. Therefore we do not need to say anything about it, or they themselves report what kind of reception you gave us. They tell how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God, and to wait for his Son from heaven, whom he raised from the dead—Jesus, who rescues us from the coming wrath.” 1 Thessalonians 1:4-10
How amazing would it be for us to be described in this way? to be described as a model church for the entire region? a church whose faith in God is known everywhere? A community who has helped lead multitudes to turn from idols to the true and living God. How great would that be?
Don’t you wish Paul would have expanded on the methodologies of the Thessalonian church? Wouldn’t it have been great if 2 Thes. were a manual that told us how to reproduce that particular model? But
Paul doesn’t tell us anything about their structure, their methods, their systems, or their programs, but he does tell us a great deal about the essence of this church.
“We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember before our God and Father, your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.”
1 Thessalonians 1:2-3
Here Paul gives us an inside look into the hearts of the Thes. believers. They were a church that was ignited and fueled by faith, love, and hope.
I believe we must become convinced that the key to an awakening lies w/in the power of these 3 spiritual essences.
So much so we @ FOCUS* have built our identity around just that:
A Community of Faith, Love, and Hope
For us to create that atmosphere w/in FOCUS* we must
construct them in each of our lives - to be people who live by FAITH, people who known by LOVE, & people who are a voice of HOPE!
How do we do that?
I.TO LIVE BY FAITH
What does it really mean to live by faith?
________ OBEDIENCE ________________
Faith begins w/ God speaking and materializes when we respond. We have primarily related to “faith” as a noun, rather than a verb. The church tends to live by “the faith” more than it lives by faith. The goal for us is to become a doctrinally sound people w/ a growing knowledge of the Bible, rather than to live in this space of “limbo” waiting for or on God.
Sure there is a time and a place to be still b4 the Lord as He speaks guidance into our lives but,
the starting point of living by faith is recognizing that God has revealed so much of His will that we have plenty to live by w/out ever hearing another word. Some things in life, we simply do not need to pray about right?
When God has spoken and commanded His people, praying sometimes becomes a way of resisting or putting off God’s will, rather than a way of responding to it.
A church begins to live by faith when it's people move the things God has clearly said into the non-optional category.
What are some of the non-optional things
God has called us to do? (table talk)
______PRAY, READ, SERVE, WORSHIP,
FELLOWSHIP, EVANGELIZE, ETC..._____
we don’t need to pray about whether we should pray... serve...evangelize.. list goes on and on...
The church, us, you and I are called to be a living expression of faith. When a church lives by faith (walking in obedience to what God has already said), then it’s people prove that God can be trusted - others will see it in your life.
We are to be people who live by FAITH, it’s a verb!
II. To be known by LOVE
"Love others as much as you love yourself." Matthew 22:39
Love is a romantic word. More songs have been written about
love than any other subject or word in the world. Would there
even be a movie industry w/out love? There is an entire genre
called romance novels because people so desperately long for love.
Yet as much as we talk about it & claim to build our lives around it, love is actually a rare commodity. Most of what we call love falls into other categories: from like to lust, “I love your shoes” or
“I love “The Simpsons” - from passion to possession. “I love the Houston Astros” or “I'd love to own that car” - We have been so inundated w/ love imitations that we've become blind to what love is really about.
In the end How does love manifest itself?
In Sacrifice
Jesus told us the way the world would know we are His followers is if we love one another.
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
John 13:34-35
To be known by LOVE.
We see love in sacrifice.
How do the relationships that we are involved in grow?
In Sacrifice.
We turn away from our own selfish wants and desires and we sacrifice what we may want to do, or where to go, or where not to go – WHY?
It is purely done out of love.
Notes from an anonymous journal:
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a
hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering
from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?" Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save his sister.
Now that’s Sacrifice. That’s being known by LOVE.
In John 15:13, Jesus gives us the practical expression of love. He says, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” Ofcourse, Jesus was speaking of his own death, explaining that his sacrifice would be the ultimate expression for the love of all humanity.
The church erupted out of an act of love. It shouldn't surprise us
that the church only moves toward God when it is fueled by love.
Listen... in a world of imitations, real love draws a crowd. It stands out. It is undeniable. It is defining.
That being the case, What is the practical expression of love? Servanthood
It is impossible to come close to God and not have love overwhelm you. And when we realize that the practical expression of love is servanthood, love begins to change everything about your relationships. In fact,
this is the one amazing things about God: He loves to serve.
In John 13 when Jesus tied a towel around his waist and began washing his disciples feet, this was not an extraordinary act for God but right in line with who He is. Jesus Christ was a servant. He was doing nothing more than expressing the serving heart of God.
“... the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve...” Matt. 20:28
People matter to God, so... People matter to us.
I have made the mistake of passing judgment on others.
Have you?
We tend to make these armchair assessments of who God has use for and who He doesn't.
Jesus made it clear of the value each person has a # of times,
but one that stands out for me was a conversation He had on the cross.
Luke 23:32-43
32 There were also two criminals led out with Jesus to be put to death. 33 When they came to a place called the Skull, the soldiers crucified Jesus and the criminals -- one on his right and the other on his left.....
38 At the top of the cross these words were written: this is the king of the jews. 39 One of the criminals on a cross began to shout insults at Jesus: "Aren't you the Christ? Then save yourself and us." 40 But the other criminal stopped him and said, "You should fear God! You are getting the same punishment he is. 41 We are punished justly, getting what we
deserve for what we did. But this man has done nothing wrong." 42 Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." 43 Jesus said to him, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise."
Think about this – while they were hanging on crosses one of them launched into a verbal tirade.
The other thief opened his eyes to what was really happening –
he realized in a short amount of time he was about to face eternity, and he was painfully aware of the kind of life he had lived. So he yells to the other criminal to SHUT UP! Can't you see what's goin on here –
we deserve to die but this man doesn't.
He looked to Christ and said
"Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." in essence he was saying, I know this sounds like a silly question, but could somebody like me, who has committed the sins I've committed, who has not exactly been a great guy, I have treated people like garbage at times, could somebody like me, still
matter to anybody?
What did Jesus say? Without hesitation, He assured this man,
“You matter far more than you can even imagine. And because of your faith and you tender spirit, you'll meet up with me a little later today in paradise, where we'll be together for eternity.
Sometimes it tough to comprehend that kind of compassion,
that kind of love. But that's exactly what God wants us to be like –
He said it is that kind of love that will show people you are my followers.
It is that kind of love that marks you as a follower of Christ.
Whenever we are known by love, God's reputation is intact.
When people see our love and sacrifice for others it shows that this is real.
It shows that "Christianity" is legit. What do people think and say when we dont show God's love towards others - when were only concerned about ourselves, when we expect everyone to just fall right in line with us -
They think were hypocritical and phoney's.
When love erupts in the hearts of God's people,
they become the servants of a lost and broken world.
And the world will see
May we be known by LOVE
III. To be a voice of HOPE
Every believer in Christ knows the meaning of Hope. Every Christ follower knows what life was like before their encounter w/ Jesus. We can look at our lives of the past and look at our lives now in Christ and see Amazing Grace, Amazing Love - and our lives now are filled w/ hope, b/c of the gospel, the message and life of Jesus Christ.
We understand that a Christless world is a hopeless world. At the same time we seem to forget that a Christ-filled world is a hope-filled world.
Somehow we’ve lost the mandate given to us by God to stand in a desperate world and offer hope.
What is the Gospel? Good News
We know that, we teach it, but we often do not communicate it as good news. When we speak the gospel of Jesus Christ, we seem to somehow get logjammed around the message of sin, damnation, and hell - no wonder so many people feel that the church has nothing but bad news to tell.
(video - "real christian of genius")
The gospel, as given to us by Jesus, is supposed to be good news. Jesus himself said, I have not come to condemn the world, but to give the world life.” John 3:17; 10:10
(world beats us up)
What would happen if people heard the message of Christ as a message of hope and not a message of judgement?
The message of Christ and the need for repentance are inseparable, but even in that, the Bible is clear in how we are to relate to people.
The Apostle Paul reminds us that it is the loving kindness of God that brings us to repentance - we are to speak the truth in LOVE - it is a message HOPE! The best indication that we are communicating the gospel effectively is that broken,
sinful, and despairing people receive it as a word of good news.
I think it’s important to remember that the people Jesus continually offended were the religious.
Sinners seem to warm up to Him quite easily.(why)
The gospel, in it’s essence, is a message of hope to a world full of despair.
A great story in the life of Jesus is in John 8, where the
religious leaders confronted Him, wanting to condemn an adulterous woman. Look at how Jesus when others tried to force Him into meanness, would not allow it. If there was ever a perfect opportunity to bring down the wrath of God on a sinful woman, it was right then. And yet from that encounter w/ this woman caught in adultery, thrown down before Him, we have some of jesus’ famous words - watch this
“Where are they?” “Who condemns you?” She stood there almost dumbfounded, astonished, maybe almost paralyzed over what just happened, it begins to settle in on her,
“no one”
Jesus revealed the heart of God when He told her He didn’t condemn her. He simply said, “Go and sin no more”
This is an important guide for each of us.
We are God’s voice of HOPE
stats - 200 mill. m,w,c lost in Amer. today
closer to home - 7 out of 10 you know lost
Those who have known nothing but condemnation and shame will find a new beginning in Jesus Christ.
God's Message:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD,
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give
you hope and a future. Jer. 29:11
The natural outcome of being connected to God is being optimistic about the future. When this permeates a biblical community, optimism and enthusiasm prevail in the church. The church of Jesus Christ is always looking forward. It
always believes in the promise of tomorrow and is never overwhelmed by the difficulty or even failure of the present.
This should be one of the markers of a New Testament community - We are to be a voice of hope b/c we are a people of hope.
A follower of Jesus Christ has no excuse for pessimism.
God has called us to be a Voice of HOPE
Who do you know that needs to hear that?
who needs a shot of hope injected into their lives?
Faith, Love, and Hope are not just foundations or pillars; they are wellsprings - It is our identity our DNA
The deeper the church digs these wells, the more rich and
resilient they become.
For us to create that atmosphere w/in FOCUS* we must
construct them in each of our lives - to be people who live by FAITH, people who known by LOVE, &
people who are a voice of HOPE!
How amazing would it be for us to be described in this way? to be described as a model church for the entire region? a church whose faith in God is known everywhere? A community who has helped lead multitudes to turn from idols to the true and living God. How great would that be?
Don’t you wish Paul would have expanded on the methodologies of the Thessalonian church? Wouldn’t it have been great if 2 Thes. were a manual that told us how to reproduce that particular model? But
Paul doesn’t tell us anything about their structure, their methods, their systems, or their programs, but he does tell us a great deal about the essence of this church.
“We always thank God for all of you, mentioning you in our prayers. We continually remember before our God and Father, your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.”
1 Thessalonians 1:2-3
Here Paul gives us an inside look into the hearts of the Thes. believers. They were a church that was ignited and fueled by faith, love, and hope.
I believe we must become convinced that the key to an awakening lies w/in the power of these 3 spiritual essences.
So much so we @ FOCUS* have built our identity around just that:
A Community of Faith, Love, and Hope
For us to create that atmosphere w/in FOCUS* we must
construct them in each of our lives - to be people who live by FAITH, people who known by LOVE, & people who are a voice of HOPE!
How do we do that?
I.TO LIVE BY FAITH
What does it really mean to live by faith?
________ OBEDIENCE ________________
Faith begins w/ God speaking and materializes when we respond. We have primarily related to “faith” as a noun, rather than a verb. The church tends to live by “the faith” more than it lives by faith. The goal for us is to become a doctrinally sound people w/ a growing knowledge of the Bible, rather than to live in this space of “limbo” waiting for or on God.
Sure there is a time and a place to be still b4 the Lord as He speaks guidance into our lives but,
the starting point of living by faith is recognizing that God has revealed so much of His will that we have plenty to live by w/out ever hearing another word. Some things in life, we simply do not need to pray about right?
When God has spoken and commanded His people, praying sometimes becomes a way of resisting or putting off God’s will, rather than a way of responding to it.
A church begins to live by faith when it's people move the things God has clearly said into the non-optional category.
What are some of the non-optional things
God has called us to do? (table talk)
______PRAY, READ, SERVE, WORSHIP,
FELLOWSHIP, EVANGELIZE, ETC..._____
we don’t need to pray about whether we should pray... serve...evangelize.. list goes on and on...
The church, us, you and I are called to be a living expression of faith. When a church lives by faith (walking in obedience to what God has already said), then it’s people prove that God can be trusted - others will see it in your life.
We are to be people who live by FAITH, it’s a verb!
II. To be known by LOVE
"Love others as much as you love yourself." Matthew 22:39
Love is a romantic word. More songs have been written about
love than any other subject or word in the world. Would there
even be a movie industry w/out love? There is an entire genre
called romance novels because people so desperately long for love.
Yet as much as we talk about it & claim to build our lives around it, love is actually a rare commodity. Most of what we call love falls into other categories: from like to lust, “I love your shoes” or
“I love “The Simpsons” - from passion to possession. “I love the Houston Astros” or “I'd love to own that car” - We have been so inundated w/ love imitations that we've become blind to what love is really about.
In the end How does love manifest itself?
In Sacrifice
Jesus told us the way the world would know we are His followers is if we love one another.
"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."
John 13:34-35
To be known by LOVE.
We see love in sacrifice.
How do the relationships that we are involved in grow?
In Sacrifice.
We turn away from our own selfish wants and desires and we sacrifice what we may want to do, or where to go, or where not to go – WHY?
It is purely done out of love.
Notes from an anonymous journal:
Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a
hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering
from a rare and serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?" Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save his sister.
Now that’s Sacrifice. That’s being known by LOVE.
In John 15:13, Jesus gives us the practical expression of love. He says, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” Ofcourse, Jesus was speaking of his own death, explaining that his sacrifice would be the ultimate expression for the love of all humanity.
The church erupted out of an act of love. It shouldn't surprise us
that the church only moves toward God when it is fueled by love.
Listen... in a world of imitations, real love draws a crowd. It stands out. It is undeniable. It is defining.
That being the case, What is the practical expression of love? Servanthood
It is impossible to come close to God and not have love overwhelm you. And when we realize that the practical expression of love is servanthood, love begins to change everything about your relationships. In fact,
this is the one amazing things about God: He loves to serve.
In John 13 when Jesus tied a towel around his waist and began washing his disciples feet, this was not an extraordinary act for God but right in line with who He is. Jesus Christ was a servant. He was doing nothing more than expressing the serving heart of God.
“... the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve...” Matt. 20:28
People matter to God, so... People matter to us.
I have made the mistake of passing judgment on others.
Have you?
We tend to make these armchair assessments of who God has use for and who He doesn't.
Jesus made it clear of the value each person has a # of times,
but one that stands out for me was a conversation He had on the cross.
Luke 23:32-43
32 There were also two criminals led out with Jesus to be put to death. 33 When they came to a place called the Skull, the soldiers crucified Jesus and the criminals -- one on his right and the other on his left.....
38 At the top of the cross these words were written: this is the king of the jews. 39 One of the criminals on a cross began to shout insults at Jesus: "Aren't you the Christ? Then save yourself and us." 40 But the other criminal stopped him and said, "You should fear God! You are getting the same punishment he is. 41 We are punished justly, getting what we
deserve for what we did. But this man has done nothing wrong." 42 Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." 43 Jesus said to him, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise."
Think about this – while they were hanging on crosses one of them launched into a verbal tirade.
The other thief opened his eyes to what was really happening –
he realized in a short amount of time he was about to face eternity, and he was painfully aware of the kind of life he had lived. So he yells to the other criminal to SHUT UP! Can't you see what's goin on here –
we deserve to die but this man doesn't.
He looked to Christ and said
"Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom." in essence he was saying, I know this sounds like a silly question, but could somebody like me, who has committed the sins I've committed, who has not exactly been a great guy, I have treated people like garbage at times, could somebody like me, still
matter to anybody?
What did Jesus say? Without hesitation, He assured this man,
“You matter far more than you can even imagine. And because of your faith and you tender spirit, you'll meet up with me a little later today in paradise, where we'll be together for eternity.
Sometimes it tough to comprehend that kind of compassion,
that kind of love. But that's exactly what God wants us to be like –
He said it is that kind of love that will show people you are my followers.
It is that kind of love that marks you as a follower of Christ.
Whenever we are known by love, God's reputation is intact.
When people see our love and sacrifice for others it shows that this is real.
It shows that "Christianity" is legit. What do people think and say when we dont show God's love towards others - when were only concerned about ourselves, when we expect everyone to just fall right in line with us -
They think were hypocritical and phoney's.
When love erupts in the hearts of God's people,
they become the servants of a lost and broken world.
And the world will see
May we be known by LOVE
III. To be a voice of HOPE
Every believer in Christ knows the meaning of Hope. Every Christ follower knows what life was like before their encounter w/ Jesus. We can look at our lives of the past and look at our lives now in Christ and see Amazing Grace, Amazing Love - and our lives now are filled w/ hope, b/c of the gospel, the message and life of Jesus Christ.
We understand that a Christless world is a hopeless world. At the same time we seem to forget that a Christ-filled world is a hope-filled world.
Somehow we’ve lost the mandate given to us by God to stand in a desperate world and offer hope.
What is the Gospel? Good News
We know that, we teach it, but we often do not communicate it as good news. When we speak the gospel of Jesus Christ, we seem to somehow get logjammed around the message of sin, damnation, and hell - no wonder so many people feel that the church has nothing but bad news to tell.
(video - "real christian of genius")
The gospel, as given to us by Jesus, is supposed to be good news. Jesus himself said, I have not come to condemn the world, but to give the world life.” John 3:17; 10:10
(world beats us up)
What would happen if people heard the message of Christ as a message of hope and not a message of judgement?
The message of Christ and the need for repentance are inseparable, but even in that, the Bible is clear in how we are to relate to people.
The Apostle Paul reminds us that it is the loving kindness of God that brings us to repentance - we are to speak the truth in LOVE - it is a message HOPE! The best indication that we are communicating the gospel effectively is that broken,
sinful, and despairing people receive it as a word of good news.
I think it’s important to remember that the people Jesus continually offended were the religious.
Sinners seem to warm up to Him quite easily.(why)
The gospel, in it’s essence, is a message of hope to a world full of despair.
A great story in the life of Jesus is in John 8, where the
religious leaders confronted Him, wanting to condemn an adulterous woman. Look at how Jesus when others tried to force Him into meanness, would not allow it. If there was ever a perfect opportunity to bring down the wrath of God on a sinful woman, it was right then. And yet from that encounter w/ this woman caught in adultery, thrown down before Him, we have some of jesus’ famous words - watch this
“Where are they?” “Who condemns you?” She stood there almost dumbfounded, astonished, maybe almost paralyzed over what just happened, it begins to settle in on her,
“no one”
Jesus revealed the heart of God when He told her He didn’t condemn her. He simply said, “Go and sin no more”
This is an important guide for each of us.
We are God’s voice of HOPE
stats - 200 mill. m,w,c lost in Amer. today
closer to home - 7 out of 10 you know lost
Those who have known nothing but condemnation and shame will find a new beginning in Jesus Christ.
God's Message:
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD,
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give
you hope and a future. Jer. 29:11
The natural outcome of being connected to God is being optimistic about the future. When this permeates a biblical community, optimism and enthusiasm prevail in the church. The church of Jesus Christ is always looking forward. It
always believes in the promise of tomorrow and is never overwhelmed by the difficulty or even failure of the present.
This should be one of the markers of a New Testament community - We are to be a voice of hope b/c we are a people of hope.
A follower of Jesus Christ has no excuse for pessimism.
God has called us to be a Voice of HOPE
Who do you know that needs to hear that?
who needs a shot of hope injected into their lives?
Faith, Love, and Hope are not just foundations or pillars; they are wellsprings - It is our identity our DNA
The deeper the church digs these wells, the more rich and
resilient they become.
For us to create that atmosphere w/in FOCUS* we must
construct them in each of our lives - to be people who live by FAITH, people who known by LOVE, &
people who are a voice of HOPE!
Sunday, January 28, 2007
GETTING FOCUS* - "Be Relevant"
I. What does it mean to 'Be Relevant'?
3 Scenarios:
1. Flat tire, car pulls up & comes out w/ jumper cables - are jumper cables relevant? Are ju. ca. important? sure just not now
2. Previous week b4 your flat tire - your office offered an optional course on tire-changing tech.and roadside safety - the week b4 your car broke down how relevant would that class have been? How motivated would you have been to sign-up and stand out in the wet air & cold wind watching someone chan-tire
3. On the roadside w/ flat tire at night - car pulls up behind you & out jump 3 big, nasty guys speaking a foreign lang. - in that moment your concern changes doesn’t it? 30 sec. b4 your concern was, “Oh no you got a flat tire” & suddenly you got a new concern.
As we think about these different scenarios, ask yourself, what makes a relevant envior? What makes something relevant?
When we look at the world today, what we may believe is absolutely irrelevant was at some point & time very relevant.
(examples - it’s hard for us to imagine that at one time)
here’s the deal - Relevance is a moving target
Scripture isn’t, theology isn’t, but relevance is a moving target.
Our methods must change, but the message stays the same. (able to extract methodology from theology)
Being Relevant is adjusting to your surroundings to share God's message.
1 Corinthians 9:19-23
“Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessing.”
Elements of Relevance
1. Culture and stage of life determines what is appealing
what’s going on around you - what’s current - pop cul; marketplace cul; bus. cul. that’s what’s appealing to the vast maj.
Jesus always did this - He pointed out something familar, something current, “ A man had 2 sons”... “look at this fig tree”
what’s going on around you - SoL, it’s diff. for an adult and a child - don’t ask a 50yr. to sit on floor and dont give a 5y. coffee.
2. Relationships are crucial
My relationships create my opportunities
we have diff. levels of relationships; close, kinda close, friends...
It is in these relation. that we can share what God has done in our lives (testimony)- so we need to cultivate these relation. - talked about 2 weeks ago - My relationships create my opportunities here we talk about Invest and Invite
3. Presentation determines interest
How we make the presentation matters. (eating out - 3 meats, beef, chix, fish - the diff. isn’t, “oh I’m tired of those 3 meats what else do you have” no when you look down the menu you look at how they’re presented. The meat is the meat, chix is chix is chix,
but there’s dozens of ways to do chix. & it’s the presentation that creates the interest, it’s not the chix.
It is not enough to present Truth
It is the pres. of the Word that makes it interesting - that’s not what makes it relevant but makes it interesting - hey David kills Goliath everytime you read it right? I dont even wanna hear another version of the story, “hey could you change it up a bit, we heard that you know?”
There’s people who can talk about David killing Gol. and you’re like uh-huh, but then there’s people who can talk about David killing Gol. and you feel the sweat dripping down Gol. whoa what’s the diff. it’s not the story - it’s the pres.
So when you see Uncle Bill every Holiday season and as you approach him, are his thoughts, “Oh no, here he comes or here she comes again, same o, same o story about Jesus”
and we’re boring them with the greatest story ever told
Truth is always relevant, but,Truth is not always perceived as relevant
We must become experts at helping people see relevant things as relevant things - this is a problem we have w/ our teens
Our task is to present Truth in such a way that people are forced to recognize and _feel_ the relevance.
This requires an engaging and creative presentation
Why is this so important that we are examining this in such detail? B/c in our relationships, (church) as we cultivate those and become comfortable w/ one another we tend to get very lax and in a rut w/ them that nothing new ever develops and we get to a point of, “we’ll they’ve heard that so... skip it”
chix is chix is chix, it’s the presentation that matters.
If our pres. isn’t engaging it isn’t interesting, if it’s not interesting then Truth is going to be perceived as irrelevant BUT Truth isn’t irrelevant, but the un-engaging pres. makes it feel irrelevant
4. Content determines relevance
Here at the church, Eric, myself, Cathleen, or others
We could be engaging and interesting and fun, humorous, telling great stories but if it’s not helpful then people walk away w/, “well I had a good time but I really didn’t get anything out of that”
Is it helpful?
Let me ask you, when you are in convo. w/ others, do they leave that convo. w/ you never thinking about it again. or...
Do you leave them w/ something, somewhere in the beg. or middle or end of the convo. do you leave them w/ something that they ponder on again? Something you said, maybe even in a nonchalant way, that they think about again.
I don’t know how many times Cathleen and I have left meetings, churches, seminars, and so forth, and we looked at each other and say, “I didn’t get anything out of that”
Has that ever happened to you?
We think, “what a waste of our time”
It is something we give a great deal of thought to here at FOCUS* - we never want people leaving thinking, “we had fun, it was interesting, we met some great people, but quite frankly I can’t remember why or what reason we were even there for to begin with - I didn’t come away with anything”
It must be helpful!
So... what must we present here and what is the content that we want to leave our friends, our family members, co-workers, in the conversations we have during the holidays or at the water cooler, what is the content? What is helpful?
God’s Word
The Truth, God’s Word is the content.
God’s Word is relevant for today. That is what we want to leave with others as much as we can.
So can you see how this all ties together?
What does it mean to be relevant?
“I have become all things to all men so that by all
possible means I might save some” 1 Corinthians 9:22
Being Relevant is Adjusting to your surroundings to share
God's message.
What makes my surroundings appealing? Culture
My relationships create my opportunities
My pres. must be engaging and interesting
and
It’s the content, God’s Word that determines the relevance
It may not be perceived that way so we must bring to the table something that is helpful, something worth remembering -
We can find that in God’s Word.
3 Scenarios:
1. Flat tire, car pulls up & comes out w/ jumper cables - are jumper cables relevant? Are ju. ca. important? sure just not now
2. Previous week b4 your flat tire - your office offered an optional course on tire-changing tech.and roadside safety - the week b4 your car broke down how relevant would that class have been? How motivated would you have been to sign-up and stand out in the wet air & cold wind watching someone chan-tire
3. On the roadside w/ flat tire at night - car pulls up behind you & out jump 3 big, nasty guys speaking a foreign lang. - in that moment your concern changes doesn’t it? 30 sec. b4 your concern was, “Oh no you got a flat tire” & suddenly you got a new concern.
As we think about these different scenarios, ask yourself, what makes a relevant envior? What makes something relevant?
When we look at the world today, what we may believe is absolutely irrelevant was at some point & time very relevant.
(examples - it’s hard for us to imagine that at one time)
here’s the deal - Relevance is a moving target
Scripture isn’t, theology isn’t, but relevance is a moving target.
Our methods must change, but the message stays the same. (able to extract methodology from theology)
Being Relevant is adjusting to your surroundings to share God's message.
1 Corinthians 9:19-23
“Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God's law but am under Christ's law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessing.”
Elements of Relevance
1. Culture and stage of life determines what is appealing
what’s going on around you - what’s current - pop cul; marketplace cul; bus. cul. that’s what’s appealing to the vast maj.
Jesus always did this - He pointed out something familar, something current, “ A man had 2 sons”... “look at this fig tree”
what’s going on around you - SoL, it’s diff. for an adult and a child - don’t ask a 50yr. to sit on floor and dont give a 5y. coffee.
2. Relationships are crucial
My relationships create my opportunities
we have diff. levels of relationships; close, kinda close, friends...
It is in these relation. that we can share what God has done in our lives (testimony)- so we need to cultivate these relation. - talked about 2 weeks ago - My relationships create my opportunities here we talk about Invest and Invite
3. Presentation determines interest
How we make the presentation matters. (eating out - 3 meats, beef, chix, fish - the diff. isn’t, “oh I’m tired of those 3 meats what else do you have” no when you look down the menu you look at how they’re presented. The meat is the meat, chix is chix is chix,
but there’s dozens of ways to do chix. & it’s the presentation that creates the interest, it’s not the chix.
It is not enough to present Truth
It is the pres. of the Word that makes it interesting - that’s not what makes it relevant but makes it interesting - hey David kills Goliath everytime you read it right? I dont even wanna hear another version of the story, “hey could you change it up a bit, we heard that you know?”
There’s people who can talk about David killing Gol. and you’re like uh-huh, but then there’s people who can talk about David killing Gol. and you feel the sweat dripping down Gol. whoa what’s the diff. it’s not the story - it’s the pres.
So when you see Uncle Bill every Holiday season and as you approach him, are his thoughts, “Oh no, here he comes or here she comes again, same o, same o story about Jesus”
and we’re boring them with the greatest story ever told
Truth is always relevant, but,Truth is not always perceived as relevant
We must become experts at helping people see relevant things as relevant things - this is a problem we have w/ our teens
Our task is to present Truth in such a way that people are forced to recognize and _feel_ the relevance.
This requires an engaging and creative presentation
Why is this so important that we are examining this in such detail? B/c in our relationships, (church) as we cultivate those and become comfortable w/ one another we tend to get very lax and in a rut w/ them that nothing new ever develops and we get to a point of, “we’ll they’ve heard that so... skip it”
chix is chix is chix, it’s the presentation that matters.
If our pres. isn’t engaging it isn’t interesting, if it’s not interesting then Truth is going to be perceived as irrelevant BUT Truth isn’t irrelevant, but the un-engaging pres. makes it feel irrelevant
4. Content determines relevance
Here at the church, Eric, myself, Cathleen, or others
We could be engaging and interesting and fun, humorous, telling great stories but if it’s not helpful then people walk away w/, “well I had a good time but I really didn’t get anything out of that”
Is it helpful?
Let me ask you, when you are in convo. w/ others, do they leave that convo. w/ you never thinking about it again. or...
Do you leave them w/ something, somewhere in the beg. or middle or end of the convo. do you leave them w/ something that they ponder on again? Something you said, maybe even in a nonchalant way, that they think about again.
I don’t know how many times Cathleen and I have left meetings, churches, seminars, and so forth, and we looked at each other and say, “I didn’t get anything out of that”
Has that ever happened to you?
We think, “what a waste of our time”
It is something we give a great deal of thought to here at FOCUS* - we never want people leaving thinking, “we had fun, it was interesting, we met some great people, but quite frankly I can’t remember why or what reason we were even there for to begin with - I didn’t come away with anything”
It must be helpful!
So... what must we present here and what is the content that we want to leave our friends, our family members, co-workers, in the conversations we have during the holidays or at the water cooler, what is the content? What is helpful?
God’s Word
The Truth, God’s Word is the content.
God’s Word is relevant for today. That is what we want to leave with others as much as we can.
So can you see how this all ties together?
What does it mean to be relevant?
“I have become all things to all men so that by all
possible means I might save some” 1 Corinthians 9:22
Being Relevant is Adjusting to your surroundings to share
God's message.
What makes my surroundings appealing? Culture
My relationships create my opportunities
My pres. must be engaging and interesting
and
It’s the content, God’s Word that determines the relevance
It may not be perceived that way so we must bring to the table something that is helpful, something worth remembering -
We can find that in God’s Word.
Sunday, January 21, 2007
GETTING FOCUS* - "Just like Jesus" part 2
“If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says”
Our Character is essentially the sum of our Habits.
The Habit of Solitude, Prayer, Intimate Community
The Habit of Getting in the Word
If we only used the Bible to study and apply it’s practical wisdom in our lives, dealing w/ people and overcoming challenges, it still would stand alone as the greatest book ever written. But the Bible is so much more than a how-to manual, it is an intimate love letter written to you from your Heavenly Father.
Through the words of Scripture, God invites us daily to experience new and exciting dimensions of His love.
Scripture is the holy Word from God, delivered by holy men, to teach holy truths, to make people holy.
We look at this book (the Bible) and think, “it’s sooo big” , but in reality if this is the primary document in which God communicates to His people, then it’s really small. So every paragraph, every line, every word is extremely important.
“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
2 Timothy 3:16-17
It is all good to know that the Bible is useful, reliable, & valuable.
It is another thing to make it your own in a practical way. It is only profitable if you read it. How can we make the Word of God more effective in our lives?
There are 5 practical ways we can cultivate the habit of Getting in the Word.
Hear the Word
The simplest way to receive the Word is to hear it from someone else. Even a young child or someone who cannot read can hear the Bible.
“If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear.” Mark 4:23
“Faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.” Romans 10:17
The parable of the sower, that Jesus taught in Matt. 13:3-23
lists 4 kinds of hearers of the Word.
The apathetic hearer hears the word but is not prepared to
receive and understand it (v19)
The superficial hearer receives the word temporarily but does not let it take root in the heart (v20-21)
The preoccupied hearer receives the Word but lets the worries of this world & the desire for other things choke it out (v22)
The reproducing hearer receives the Word, understands it, bears fruit, and brings forth results (v.23)
Which kind of hearer are you?
small group discussion: what are some ways/examples we can hear the Word?
Read the Word
2nd way to Get in the Word is to read it.
“Blessed is the one who reads the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it.” Revelation 1:3
This is simply displaying the fact that it is a value in your life and making time to open up the Word of God.
Study the Word
When we study the Word, we go deeper into it’s meaning and application for our lives.
“Now the Bereans were of more noble character... for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true.”
Acts 17:11
With study, we begin to have more power in our handling of the Word. Bible study is an in-depth look into the scripture, to learn and to discover more than you would see during a simple overview or in a devotional reading. Studying involves comparing what the Bible says in one passage to other passages thruout the Bible. It might begin w/ a question that prompts you to search for it’s answer. It is helpful to use other study tools such as commentaries or concordances - there are a ton of helpful bible study websites. Maybe you want to do a word or person study in scripture - 1yr. I examined every word that Jesus spoke in the N.T. each gospel, the book of Acts and Rev. to discover - to do in depth study of the Character of Jesus Christ.
Memorize the Word
A deeper way to get the Word in you is to memorize it.
When you remember the Word, it really lives in you, you live in it, and God’s promises become your possessions.
“How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word...I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” Psalm 119:9,11
Jesus again models for us one reason why we need God’s Word hidden in our hearts. During His time of 40 days of solitude in the wilderness, Satan tempts Christ 3 different times -
How did Jesus model for us to deal w/ these temptations?
He quotes scripture.
It also helps us to answer those who may question our faith.
“Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.” 1 Pet. 3:15
Having God’s Word alive in us enables us to handle the pressures and difficulties of life so much easier. (life scrip. - sleep)
Meditate on the Word
Another way we live in the Word & the Word lives in us is to think about it or meditate on it.
“His delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night.” Psalm 1:2
While memorization puts God’s Word in your head, meditation puts it in you heart.
When I’m referring to meditating on scrip. it’s not like sitting in some yoga stance chatting, “ooohhmmmm” it has nothing to do w/ eastern religious practices - those forms of meditation they are trying to close off their mind to everything around them to find the answer w/in themselves - let me assure of something right now - you don’t have the answer - it’s not in you! Only God has the answer - it is found in His Word.
Sure in our times of solitude listening for God, the Holy Spirit will answer and lead and guide us but in meditating on God’s Word is when you focus on a specific verse of scripture. Usually one line, 2 at the most and think it about it on how it applies to your life and ask the Holy Spirit for His revelation as we meditate on God’s Word. -
Read the verse a number of times, paraphrase it, apply your name in it (if that’s fitting) and always in study and in meditation have a pen/pencil and a notepad - b/c
“The same thing is true of the words I speak. They will not return to me empty. They make the things happen that I want to happen, and they succeed in doing what I send them to do.”
Isaiah 55:11
The Habit of Trusting in God’s Unconditional Love
In each of our lives, we will come to points of decision that will reveal where we put our trust and hope. We continue to face the fear of the negative consequences of taking a stand & the temptation to rely on our self-accumulated resources & efforts as our source of self-worth and security.
We live in a world that fuels the fires of pride and fear. Through fads, fashion, and pressure to ‘keep up w/ the Jones’ we are constantly being lured into believing we can secure a sense of meaning and safety in stuff, or wealth, or even other human relationships. Standing in absolute contrast to these temporary, always-at-risk, never secure places to put our trust is the unconditional love and promises of God.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30
The effects of God’s personal, unchanging, unrestrained love for you are enormous - so enormous that it might seem easier to consider His love so far beyond comprehension that you may not or don’t even try to understand it - but if we do not try we leave the dearly purchased gift unopened and the joy of the giver unrealized.
To put our trust in His love not only affects our lives directly, but is integrated in every relationship and all that we do.
To be just like Jesus, we must love Jesus
Everything that we attempt in our lives, such as developing biblical character traits hangs in the balance in our response to the question Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?”
Our answer should not be taken lightly b/c Jesus is taking it
seriously. Our answer will reveal our true motivations for all we have done. Jesus asked, “Do you love me?”
He didn’t ask Peter if he feared Him, respected Him, or admired Him; instead He asked, “Do you love me?”
That is the beginning to everything in life. That is where new life starts. It’s a ? He asks us all - “Do you love me?”
Then live for me.
To be just like Jesus, we must love like Jesus
If we do not really love Jesus, then we will not truly love people.
Remember Jesus’ follow-up to His question for Peter? He 1st asks, “Do you love me?” Peter responds with, “Yes Lord, you know that I love you.” A very similar response that we might have, huh? Jesus replies with, “Then feed my sheep”
So often we take this conversation between Jesus & Peter as a commissioning of sorts into ministry - we believe that, “well that was for Peter, he’s a pastor, it doesn’t apply to me in that way”
Aahhh... but it applies to every follower - Jesus wants to see the evidence of our love for Him.
“Inasmuch as you have done it unto one of the least of these, you have done it unto me.” Matthew 25:40
Jesus is teaching us that how we treat other people is how we treat Him.
As we clearly understand His unconditional love for us, we begin to put it into practice everyday. We are to express our love for Jesus, by loving those He places in our path.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." Jn. 13:34,35
If we want to be just like Jesus, then we must love like Jesus
People matter to God, therefore people matter to us.
Our Character is essentially the sum of our Habits.
To be just like Jesus we need to develop these spiritual habits of solitude, prayer, intimate community, getting into God’s Word, and loving like Jesus.
“If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says”
Our Character is essentially the sum of our Habits.
The Habit of Solitude, Prayer, Intimate Community
The Habit of Getting in the Word
If we only used the Bible to study and apply it’s practical wisdom in our lives, dealing w/ people and overcoming challenges, it still would stand alone as the greatest book ever written. But the Bible is so much more than a how-to manual, it is an intimate love letter written to you from your Heavenly Father.
Through the words of Scripture, God invites us daily to experience new and exciting dimensions of His love.
Scripture is the holy Word from God, delivered by holy men, to teach holy truths, to make people holy.
We look at this book (the Bible) and think, “it’s sooo big” , but in reality if this is the primary document in which God communicates to His people, then it’s really small. So every paragraph, every line, every word is extremely important.
“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
2 Timothy 3:16-17
It is all good to know that the Bible is useful, reliable, & valuable.
It is another thing to make it your own in a practical way. It is only profitable if you read it. How can we make the Word of God more effective in our lives?
There are 5 practical ways we can cultivate the habit of Getting in the Word.
Hear the Word
The simplest way to receive the Word is to hear it from someone else. Even a young child or someone who cannot read can hear the Bible.
“If anyone has ears to hear, let him hear.” Mark 4:23
“Faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.” Romans 10:17
The parable of the sower, that Jesus taught in Matt. 13:3-23
lists 4 kinds of hearers of the Word.
The apathetic hearer hears the word but is not prepared to
receive and understand it (v19)
The superficial hearer receives the word temporarily but does not let it take root in the heart (v20-21)
The preoccupied hearer receives the Word but lets the worries of this world & the desire for other things choke it out (v22)
The reproducing hearer receives the Word, understands it, bears fruit, and brings forth results (v.23)
Which kind of hearer are you?
small group discussion: what are some ways/examples we can hear the Word?
Read the Word
2nd way to Get in the Word is to read it.
“Blessed is the one who reads the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear it and take to heart what is written in it.” Revelation 1:3
This is simply displaying the fact that it is a value in your life and making time to open up the Word of God.
Study the Word
When we study the Word, we go deeper into it’s meaning and application for our lives.
“Now the Bereans were of more noble character... for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true.”
Acts 17:11
With study, we begin to have more power in our handling of the Word. Bible study is an in-depth look into the scripture, to learn and to discover more than you would see during a simple overview or in a devotional reading. Studying involves comparing what the Bible says in one passage to other passages thruout the Bible. It might begin w/ a question that prompts you to search for it’s answer. It is helpful to use other study tools such as commentaries or concordances - there are a ton of helpful bible study websites. Maybe you want to do a word or person study in scripture - 1yr. I examined every word that Jesus spoke in the N.T. each gospel, the book of Acts and Rev. to discover - to do in depth study of the Character of Jesus Christ.
Memorize the Word
A deeper way to get the Word in you is to memorize it.
When you remember the Word, it really lives in you, you live in it, and God’s promises become your possessions.
“How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word...I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” Psalm 119:9,11
Jesus again models for us one reason why we need God’s Word hidden in our hearts. During His time of 40 days of solitude in the wilderness, Satan tempts Christ 3 different times -
How did Jesus model for us to deal w/ these temptations?
He quotes scripture.
It also helps us to answer those who may question our faith.
“Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.” 1 Pet. 3:15
Having God’s Word alive in us enables us to handle the pressures and difficulties of life so much easier. (life scrip. - sleep)
Meditate on the Word
Another way we live in the Word & the Word lives in us is to think about it or meditate on it.
“His delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates day and night.” Psalm 1:2
While memorization puts God’s Word in your head, meditation puts it in you heart.
When I’m referring to meditating on scrip. it’s not like sitting in some yoga stance chatting, “ooohhmmmm” it has nothing to do w/ eastern religious practices - those forms of meditation they are trying to close off their mind to everything around them to find the answer w/in themselves - let me assure of something right now - you don’t have the answer - it’s not in you! Only God has the answer - it is found in His Word.
Sure in our times of solitude listening for God, the Holy Spirit will answer and lead and guide us but in meditating on God’s Word is when you focus on a specific verse of scripture. Usually one line, 2 at the most and think it about it on how it applies to your life and ask the Holy Spirit for His revelation as we meditate on God’s Word. -
Read the verse a number of times, paraphrase it, apply your name in it (if that’s fitting) and always in study and in meditation have a pen/pencil and a notepad - b/c
“The same thing is true of the words I speak. They will not return to me empty. They make the things happen that I want to happen, and they succeed in doing what I send them to do.”
Isaiah 55:11
The Habit of Trusting in God’s Unconditional Love
In each of our lives, we will come to points of decision that will reveal where we put our trust and hope. We continue to face the fear of the negative consequences of taking a stand & the temptation to rely on our self-accumulated resources & efforts as our source of self-worth and security.
We live in a world that fuels the fires of pride and fear. Through fads, fashion, and pressure to ‘keep up w/ the Jones’ we are constantly being lured into believing we can secure a sense of meaning and safety in stuff, or wealth, or even other human relationships. Standing in absolute contrast to these temporary, always-at-risk, never secure places to put our trust is the unconditional love and promises of God.
“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:28-30
The effects of God’s personal, unchanging, unrestrained love for you are enormous - so enormous that it might seem easier to consider His love so far beyond comprehension that you may not or don’t even try to understand it - but if we do not try we leave the dearly purchased gift unopened and the joy of the giver unrealized.
To put our trust in His love not only affects our lives directly, but is integrated in every relationship and all that we do.
To be just like Jesus, we must love Jesus
Everything that we attempt in our lives, such as developing biblical character traits hangs in the balance in our response to the question Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?”
Our answer should not be taken lightly b/c Jesus is taking it
seriously. Our answer will reveal our true motivations for all we have done. Jesus asked, “Do you love me?”
He didn’t ask Peter if he feared Him, respected Him, or admired Him; instead He asked, “Do you love me?”
That is the beginning to everything in life. That is where new life starts. It’s a ? He asks us all - “Do you love me?”
Then live for me.
To be just like Jesus, we must love like Jesus
If we do not really love Jesus, then we will not truly love people.
Remember Jesus’ follow-up to His question for Peter? He 1st asks, “Do you love me?” Peter responds with, “Yes Lord, you know that I love you.” A very similar response that we might have, huh? Jesus replies with, “Then feed my sheep”
So often we take this conversation between Jesus & Peter as a commissioning of sorts into ministry - we believe that, “well that was for Peter, he’s a pastor, it doesn’t apply to me in that way”
Aahhh... but it applies to every follower - Jesus wants to see the evidence of our love for Him.
“Inasmuch as you have done it unto one of the least of these, you have done it unto me.” Matthew 25:40
Jesus is teaching us that how we treat other people is how we treat Him.
As we clearly understand His unconditional love for us, we begin to put it into practice everyday. We are to express our love for Jesus, by loving those He places in our path.
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." Jn. 13:34,35
If we want to be just like Jesus, then we must love like Jesus
People matter to God, therefore people matter to us.
Our Character is essentially the sum of our Habits.
To be just like Jesus we need to develop these spiritual habits of solitude, prayer, intimate community, getting into God’s Word, and loving like Jesus.
“If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says”
Sunday, January 14, 2007
GETTING FOCUS* - "Just like Jesus" part 1
If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says
A couple of weeks ago I talked to you about Laying the Foundation for the new year -
we looked at 8 characteristics of Neh. that are essential for us in life
So today I’m going to get painfully practical - How do we instill those character traits in our own lives?
We have 2 selves: An external, task-oriented self that is used to getting jobs done, & we have an internal, more reflective self that is very thoughtful. Which of our 2 selves wakes up quicker in the morning? It’s our external, task-or. self.
What happens in the morning? The alarm goes off! which immediately ignites our task-or. self, & we jump out of bed.
We head to the bathroom, take care of business, begin getting ready for the work or school day - brush teeth (i hope), do our hair, make-up, clothes, get kids ready (if that applies), try to get some breakfast - race to the car b/c we’re running late - screaming for everyone to get in the car.
Move thru our w/s day - head home thinking of what needs to be done at home, get dinner ready, do homework w/kids, maybe talk on the phone a bit or watch some TV then fall into bed exhausted and the alarm goes off the next day!
Comedian Lily Tomlin once said, “The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.”
To avoid being consumed by the rat race & the pressures of life, all of us need to develop strategies and spiritual habits that will help us stay on track w/ what’s really important.
So if we back up a couple of weeks to the 8 chara. of Neh.
How do we instill those character traits in our own lives?
(look at N.T. today and the life of Jesus Christ)
Our Character is essentially the sum of our habits
We get off track easily, we get distracted easily, even w/ the good. If we look at the life of Christ, we see Jesus never got off track - He stayed focused all of the time. What was it that kept Him on track and focused?
I believe it was His habits.
If we want to develop these char. traits then I think we need to look at the life of Christ, our perfect role model and carefully
observe His habits.
To ask, “WWJD” the answer can be found in His habits.
The Habit of Solitude
Of the 5 habits were going to discuss, solitude is by far the most elusive in our modern world of busyness and 24-7 communications. Solitude is a countercultural and challenging behavior.
It draws us into the very place from that we try so hard to avoid - being truly alone w/ God w/out an agenda.
It is a rare & often unsettling feeling to stop doing and just be.
Yet as strange as it feels to actively ‘cease moving forward’ or ‘doing’, the result can be life changing.
Solitude is being completely alone w/ God away from all human contact for extended periods of time. It is like stepping out out the back door of your noisy life of to-do lists and demanding
relationships to breathe in some fresh air.
It is being refreshed and restored in life by being alone w/ God and has nothing to do with the impact of our attempts to do something or from any other person. It is taking time to listen to that still small voice in which God speaks to your soul and tells you that you are His beloved.
Jesus modeled solitude as an integral component of His life and ministry:
-When preparing for for the tests of leadership & public min., Jesus spent 40 days alone in the desert
-Before Jesus chose His 12 Dis. from among His followers, He spent the entire night alone in the desert hills.
-When Jesus received the news of the death of John Bap, He withdrew in a boat to a lonely place
-After the miraculous feeding of the 5,000, Jesus went up in the hills by Himself
It was in these times of preparing to lead, making important decisions, handling bad news, & dealing w/ praise and recognition that Jesus modeled the value of spending time alone to settle in and find that ‘true north’ of our God compass.
“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place,
where he prayed.” Mark 1:35
These words stand between Jesus and the temptation to spend His precious time doing the popular thing instead of doing the primary work He came to do.
The reality is most of us spend little time, if any time in solitude. Yet if we don’t, how can God have a chance to talk w/ us?
The Habit of Prayer
Prayer is an essential act of the will that demonstrates whether we are really serious about living like Jesus.
W/out it, we will never be able to open the way for connecting our plans and efforts w/ God’s plan for His kingdom or engaging the spiritual resources that Jesus promised to us all - that is the work of the Holy Spirit.
Seeking God’s will thru prayer, waiting in faith for an answer, & being at peace w/ the outcome call for a level of spiritual maturity that will keep anyone seeking to be just like Jesus in the posture of a lifelong learner.
Jesus’ Prayer in Gethsemane
Nowhere in the bible is a model of praying like Jesus more powerfully provided for us than in the dark hours of the night before He was betrayed. This was a time when the temptation to abandon His mission was at an almost unbearable moment:
“Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me."
Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." Matthew 26:36-39
1. Where did Jesus pray and why?
He went off by Himself for prayer. A troubled soul finds the most ease when it is alone w/ God, who understands the broken language of sighs and groans. While alone w/ the Father, Jesus could freely pour out His heart w/out restraint.
2. What was Jesus’ posture in prayer?
He fell on His face before His Father, indicating His agony, extreme sorrow, and humility in prayer. At other times Jesus prayed looking up to heaven, w/ His eyes open, or kneeling.
The posture of the heart is more important than the posture of the body, but physically kneeling or laying
before God helps our heart posture.
3. What did Jesus ask?
He asked, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me.
He was asking if He could avoid suffering on the cross. But notice the way He phrased His request: if it is possible
He left the answer to the Father when He said, Yet not as I will, but as you will. He based His own willingness upon the Father’s will.
4. What was the answer to Jesus’ prayer?
His answer was that the will of the Father be done. He got His answer, and was strengthened for the mission He was to fulfill.
Sometimes that’s not so easy for us, our human tendency is to avoid the pain or difficulty - but we must trust in the fact that Father knows best. He has our best interests - He knows what lies ahead and we are trust and believe in faith.
Some people ask, ‘how do you pray’? 1st of all, prayer is not a technique; it’s a conversation w/ God. We all need to develop our own style of conversing w/ the Father - He wants you to be you - to talk to Him as any other conver. - not imitating a prayer or someone who we may think really prays great prayers - just be yourself. With that said, sometimes a little framework is helpful to get started or to lead our prayers.
the ACTS acronym is very helpful for that.
Adoration - All prayer should begin here.
“Enter His courts w/ praise.” Tell God how amazing He is... to you... in your life... in the world
Confession - Immediately when we come into the presence of a holy God, we sense our inadequacies and realize that we fall short of His glory - So our 1st step in meeting and adoring is confession. We may even want to confess our sins before we express our adoration and love.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
Thanksgiving - This is a heartfelt expression of gratitude for all He has done in creation, in redemption (saving us), & in our lives. During this time of prayer thank God specifically for all that He has done since the last time you talked.
“Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Ephesians 5:19-20
Supplication - Finally, we get to the part where most of us start - asking. Supplication is just a big word for asking for what you need. Start by praying about others’ needs & then ask for your own needs to be met. It’s OK to have a big “wish list” - according to God’s Word, we can ask in confidence.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7
God wants to know the details of your life - the big and the small so spill your guts.
The Habit of Intimate Community
The time Jesus spent in fellowship, hanging out w/ His disciples seems to have been for their benefit and His.
Among the 12 that He called out to be His apostles, Jesus had a small group of 3, Pete, Jim, & John - w/ whom He seemed to have a closer relationship with.
He took those 3 w/ Him to special places and events - the Mount of Transfiguration, the 3 were w/ Him when He raised the daughter of the synagogue leader from the dead, and this inner circle was w/ Him on the night He would be betrayed and arrested on His final journey to the cross.
We need others in our lives - we were created for community.
When we rely on our own perspective of how we are doing, we are bound to slip into convenient thinking to go easy on ourselves, to compromise our integrity of these characteristics we are trying to establish in our lives.
We need trusted truth-tellers.
Preferably those not directly impacted by what we do, who can help us stay on course.
If you can’t name any truth-tellers in your life, or if you have avoided or undervalued the ones you have, it’s time to change.
Having truth-tellers is probably the greatest resource for growth that we can have.
“Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” Proverbs 27:6
Bring truth-tellers into your life - it allows accountability - and enables us to open up - to share and listen, to be vulnerable.
Being vulnerable is one of the most powerful things we can do in building relationships w/ others.
They know you’re not perfect, so don’t act like you are.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10,12
We also need encouragers
When things aren’t going so smooth, when life is beating you up, when you want to pinch the heads off your kids, when you work for that pushy, arrogant boss - we need others to lift us up out of the doldrums - we need encouragement
We need someone to tell us everything is going to be OK
Sometimes life just rips out the capacity to believe in what you are capable of doing - sometimes we have waited for something to happen for long we don’t ever think it’s going to happen. Sometimes it’s attempts that failed, “I gave it my best shot, it didn’t happen”
So when times get tough we just lower our stand/expect.
We need others to put the ‘courage’ back in our lives.
We need others helping us to believe that we can do all and everything God has called us to do - to say, YES U CAN!
“let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together... but let us encourage one another.” Hebrews 10:24-25
This habit, Intimate Community, along w/ Solitude and Prayer
will keep us focused - to develop these habits in life will equate to the character traits we all long for.
To try our best to be just like Jesus.
Our Character is essentially the sum of our habits
If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says
A couple of weeks ago I talked to you about Laying the Foundation for the new year -
we looked at 8 characteristics of Neh. that are essential for us in life
So today I’m going to get painfully practical - How do we instill those character traits in our own lives?
We have 2 selves: An external, task-oriented self that is used to getting jobs done, & we have an internal, more reflective self that is very thoughtful. Which of our 2 selves wakes up quicker in the morning? It’s our external, task-or. self.
What happens in the morning? The alarm goes off! which immediately ignites our task-or. self, & we jump out of bed.
We head to the bathroom, take care of business, begin getting ready for the work or school day - brush teeth (i hope), do our hair, make-up, clothes, get kids ready (if that applies), try to get some breakfast - race to the car b/c we’re running late - screaming for everyone to get in the car.
Move thru our w/s day - head home thinking of what needs to be done at home, get dinner ready, do homework w/kids, maybe talk on the phone a bit or watch some TV then fall into bed exhausted and the alarm goes off the next day!
Comedian Lily Tomlin once said, “The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.”
To avoid being consumed by the rat race & the pressures of life, all of us need to develop strategies and spiritual habits that will help us stay on track w/ what’s really important.
So if we back up a couple of weeks to the 8 chara. of Neh.
How do we instill those character traits in our own lives?
(look at N.T. today and the life of Jesus Christ)
Our Character is essentially the sum of our habits
We get off track easily, we get distracted easily, even w/ the good. If we look at the life of Christ, we see Jesus never got off track - He stayed focused all of the time. What was it that kept Him on track and focused?
I believe it was His habits.
If we want to develop these char. traits then I think we need to look at the life of Christ, our perfect role model and carefully
observe His habits.
To ask, “WWJD” the answer can be found in His habits.
The Habit of Solitude
Of the 5 habits were going to discuss, solitude is by far the most elusive in our modern world of busyness and 24-7 communications. Solitude is a countercultural and challenging behavior.
It draws us into the very place from that we try so hard to avoid - being truly alone w/ God w/out an agenda.
It is a rare & often unsettling feeling to stop doing and just be.
Yet as strange as it feels to actively ‘cease moving forward’ or ‘doing’, the result can be life changing.
Solitude is being completely alone w/ God away from all human contact for extended periods of time. It is like stepping out out the back door of your noisy life of to-do lists and demanding
relationships to breathe in some fresh air.
It is being refreshed and restored in life by being alone w/ God and has nothing to do with the impact of our attempts to do something or from any other person. It is taking time to listen to that still small voice in which God speaks to your soul and tells you that you are His beloved.
Jesus modeled solitude as an integral component of His life and ministry:
-When preparing for for the tests of leadership & public min., Jesus spent 40 days alone in the desert
-Before Jesus chose His 12 Dis. from among His followers, He spent the entire night alone in the desert hills.
-When Jesus received the news of the death of John Bap, He withdrew in a boat to a lonely place
-After the miraculous feeding of the 5,000, Jesus went up in the hills by Himself
It was in these times of preparing to lead, making important decisions, handling bad news, & dealing w/ praise and recognition that Jesus modeled the value of spending time alone to settle in and find that ‘true north’ of our God compass.
“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place,
where he prayed.” Mark 1:35
These words stand between Jesus and the temptation to spend His precious time doing the popular thing instead of doing the primary work He came to do.
The reality is most of us spend little time, if any time in solitude. Yet if we don’t, how can God have a chance to talk w/ us?
The Habit of Prayer
Prayer is an essential act of the will that demonstrates whether we are really serious about living like Jesus.
W/out it, we will never be able to open the way for connecting our plans and efforts w/ God’s plan for His kingdom or engaging the spiritual resources that Jesus promised to us all - that is the work of the Holy Spirit.
Seeking God’s will thru prayer, waiting in faith for an answer, & being at peace w/ the outcome call for a level of spiritual maturity that will keep anyone seeking to be just like Jesus in the posture of a lifelong learner.
Jesus’ Prayer in Gethsemane
Nowhere in the bible is a model of praying like Jesus more powerfully provided for us than in the dark hours of the night before He was betrayed. This was a time when the temptation to abandon His mission was at an almost unbearable moment:
“Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me."
Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." Matthew 26:36-39
1. Where did Jesus pray and why?
He went off by Himself for prayer. A troubled soul finds the most ease when it is alone w/ God, who understands the broken language of sighs and groans. While alone w/ the Father, Jesus could freely pour out His heart w/out restraint.
2. What was Jesus’ posture in prayer?
He fell on His face before His Father, indicating His agony, extreme sorrow, and humility in prayer. At other times Jesus prayed looking up to heaven, w/ His eyes open, or kneeling.
The posture of the heart is more important than the posture of the body, but physically kneeling or laying
before God helps our heart posture.
3. What did Jesus ask?
He asked, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me.
He was asking if He could avoid suffering on the cross. But notice the way He phrased His request: if it is possible
He left the answer to the Father when He said, Yet not as I will, but as you will. He based His own willingness upon the Father’s will.
4. What was the answer to Jesus’ prayer?
His answer was that the will of the Father be done. He got His answer, and was strengthened for the mission He was to fulfill.
Sometimes that’s not so easy for us, our human tendency is to avoid the pain or difficulty - but we must trust in the fact that Father knows best. He has our best interests - He knows what lies ahead and we are trust and believe in faith.
Some people ask, ‘how do you pray’? 1st of all, prayer is not a technique; it’s a conversation w/ God. We all need to develop our own style of conversing w/ the Father - He wants you to be you - to talk to Him as any other conver. - not imitating a prayer or someone who we may think really prays great prayers - just be yourself. With that said, sometimes a little framework is helpful to get started or to lead our prayers.
the ACTS acronym is very helpful for that.
Adoration - All prayer should begin here.
“Enter His courts w/ praise.” Tell God how amazing He is... to you... in your life... in the world
Confession - Immediately when we come into the presence of a holy God, we sense our inadequacies and realize that we fall short of His glory - So our 1st step in meeting and adoring is confession. We may even want to confess our sins before we express our adoration and love.
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9
Thanksgiving - This is a heartfelt expression of gratitude for all He has done in creation, in redemption (saving us), & in our lives. During this time of prayer thank God specifically for all that He has done since the last time you talked.
“Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Ephesians 5:19-20
Supplication - Finally, we get to the part where most of us start - asking. Supplication is just a big word for asking for what you need. Start by praying about others’ needs & then ask for your own needs to be met. It’s OK to have a big “wish list” - according to God’s Word, we can ask in confidence.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7
God wants to know the details of your life - the big and the small so spill your guts.
The Habit of Intimate Community
The time Jesus spent in fellowship, hanging out w/ His disciples seems to have been for their benefit and His.
Among the 12 that He called out to be His apostles, Jesus had a small group of 3, Pete, Jim, & John - w/ whom He seemed to have a closer relationship with.
He took those 3 w/ Him to special places and events - the Mount of Transfiguration, the 3 were w/ Him when He raised the daughter of the synagogue leader from the dead, and this inner circle was w/ Him on the night He would be betrayed and arrested on His final journey to the cross.
We need others in our lives - we were created for community.
When we rely on our own perspective of how we are doing, we are bound to slip into convenient thinking to go easy on ourselves, to compromise our integrity of these characteristics we are trying to establish in our lives.
We need trusted truth-tellers.
Preferably those not directly impacted by what we do, who can help us stay on course.
If you can’t name any truth-tellers in your life, or if you have avoided or undervalued the ones you have, it’s time to change.
Having truth-tellers is probably the greatest resource for growth that we can have.
“Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” Proverbs 27:6
Bring truth-tellers into your life - it allows accountability - and enables us to open up - to share and listen, to be vulnerable.
Being vulnerable is one of the most powerful things we can do in building relationships w/ others.
They know you’re not perfect, so don’t act like you are.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10,12
We also need encouragers
When things aren’t going so smooth, when life is beating you up, when you want to pinch the heads off your kids, when you work for that pushy, arrogant boss - we need others to lift us up out of the doldrums - we need encouragement
We need someone to tell us everything is going to be OK
Sometimes life just rips out the capacity to believe in what you are capable of doing - sometimes we have waited for something to happen for long we don’t ever think it’s going to happen. Sometimes it’s attempts that failed, “I gave it my best shot, it didn’t happen”
So when times get tough we just lower our stand/expect.
We need others to put the ‘courage’ back in our lives.
We need others helping us to believe that we can do all and everything God has called us to do - to say, YES U CAN!
“let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together... but let us encourage one another.” Hebrews 10:24-25
This habit, Intimate Community, along w/ Solitude and Prayer
will keep us focused - to develop these habits in life will equate to the character traits we all long for.
To try our best to be just like Jesus.
Our Character is essentially the sum of our habits
If we can see what God sees, we’ll do what God says
Sunday, January 07, 2007
GETTING FOCUS* - "FOCUS on..... FIGHTING" - by Cathleen Parks
A few weeks ago Joe and I talked about this series and we set today as a day that I would give the message.
1 Timothy 6:3-12 - "If anyone teaches false doctrines and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, 4he is conceited and understands nothing. He has an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions 5and constant friction between men of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.
6But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. 9People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. 10For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.
11But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness (acting in accord with divine or moral law : free from guilt or sin), godliness (god-like) , faith, love, endurance and gentleness. 12Fight the good fight of the faith."
Share thoughts on how I felt ‘this must be it’ and how God molded that into an emphasis on gentleness. Specifically...fighting with gentleness.
As I pondered the 2 points we are going to be looking at I had a moment of reality. Do you ever have those moments when God gives you the opportunity see something in it’s full perspective? 20/20 I had one of those moments. It was humbling - it was very dramatic for me. God allowed me to see, in a flash, how much he has changed me in some areas in my life and as I stood there pondering these changes, He spoke very gently to my heart and said, ‘You are going to share a testimony you didn’t even know you had.’ Our testimony = our story
Revelation 12:10b-11 tells us....
For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. 11 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony;
So many times I’ve heard people say, “I don’t have a good testimony - I don’t have anything interesting to say.” Expand
Testimony is simply the story of our life or of specific events (in the short term or long term) in our lives. And the beautiful thing about sharing our testimony is that you never know what God is going to do with it. But the Bible is clear that ‘the word of our testimony’ is what overcomes the power of Satan in our lives and in the lives of others. Our testimony injects hope, faith, endurance and the truth of God’s promises or His faithfulness into the lives of those around us and encourages us to keep going and growing in Christ. So when God said to me ‘You are going to share a testimony you didn’t even know you had.’ I knew exactly what He meant. Because when it comes to fighting with gentleness, this has been a huge process of repentance, restoration and change in my life. And I’ll tell you right now that I have not fully arrived but as that old cigarette commercial says ‘I’ve come a long way baby’. And so when I talk about the things I am going to talk about today I speak from experience. I share with you a history of behavior that is embarrassing, and frankly, shameful to me. But I rejoice in the journey that God has lead me on and the renewal he has done in my life in regards to fighting with gentleness.
When you are in deep relationship with others you will argue......period. I’m not talking about knock down drag outs. I’m saying there will be times that you don’t agree with one another and you will disagree with enough conviction that you’ll feel you need to defend/explain yourself, or to attempt to change someone else’s mind.
You will argue for a variety of reasons - and you will do this because that’s what people who are in deep relationship do - occasionally. It’s just gonna happen. Arguing is not bad. Disagreeing with someone or having them disagree with you is not bad. HOW you argue is where things can turn bad. Your method of argument is powerful in determining the outcome of your argument. By outcome I don’t mean who wins. I mean will you and the other individual walk away with a greater respect and trust for one another or will you emotionally and/or spiritually limp away? If we truly love those in our lives we must be committed to learn and put into practice methods of arguing that are productive.
First point that God brought to my mind earlier this week and that hind sight reminds me it’s a road I’ve walked...
Two points
1. Learn to motivate instead of manipulate
motivation is stemmed by logical discussion or heartfelt desire whereas manipulation is stemmed by the need to be right or get what you want
KEY: when you are arguing with someone do your words influence their emotions or their minds?
An argument that is conducted in a God honoring way will communicate mutual respect even in the midst of the debate. Are your words communicating that what your have to say is important to you and that you love the other individual enough that you want them to understand why you think or feel the way you do? Or are your words failing to communicate and simply resulting in an emotional outpouring on your part or drawing an emotional response from the person your talking to? Ask yourself:
Can the person you are arguing with truly discern the purpose behind what your saying or is the purpose of the argument lost in the emotion of the moment?
2. Lower your voice, I can’t hear you.
sounds strange
When we arguing and we get to the place where we are just yelling, we are not being heard...period.
Demonstrate
How do I do it differently?
1. Check your motives
2. Check your voice
3. Check your volume
4. Check your self
5. Check your temper
An argument conducted in a God honoring way, that has a purpose, is okay. In fact it’s good. We learn about each other and from each other when we argue in the right way because these discussions become more about a passionate exchange of who we are and what is important to us than a yelling match. And argument based on emotions, or winning, or releasing frustration/anger is highly destructive. It tears at the essence of what a healthy relationship is founded on and that is trust, respect, love.
If you have been arguing in this destructive fashion and you want to purpose to change that behavior, there are some things you have to do as soon as you have the opportunity.
1. Confess to the person that you argue destructively with. Help them to see that you recognize and take responsibility for your actions. (Don’t hold them to the same standards you are holding yourself to!)
2. Repent/Renounce - turn away from
Proverbs 28:13 (New International Version)
13 He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.
3. Make a game plan
4. Forgive yourself and the other individual
5. Confess your behavior to a trusted confidant
James 5:16 (New International Version)
16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
6. Pray
Prayer:
Lord, I believe that what you’ve revealed to us today, by your Word and by your Spirit, are principles that are to change our lives. Your Word tells us that the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy but you come to bring abundant life. I ask you Lord today to reach out to each individual in this room who sees themselves reflected in this message. Show us where our arguments deviate from your character. Show us where our behavior reaps destruction in our lives and in the lives of those we love. Lord let your Spirit flow in this place. Let your forgiveness rest on us as we confess to you that we have sinned when we have used our words in hurtful ways or for personal gain. Thank you Lord that you are a forgiving God. Thank you Lord that we don’t have to learn on our own how to change our ways but that, if we invite you into this process, you will be with us every step of the way. Cause us to be sensitive to your Spirit, that when our motives or words get out of step, that we will feel the tug of your Spirit cautioning us stop before we sin. Thank you that living according to your principles brings us great satisfaction in our lives and in our relationships.
Amen
1 Timothy 6:3-12 - "If anyone teaches false doctrines and does not agree to the sound instruction of our Lord Jesus Christ and to godly teaching, 4he is conceited and understands nothing. He has an unhealthy interest in controversies and quarrels about words that result in envy, strife, malicious talk, evil suspicions 5and constant friction between men of corrupt mind, who have been robbed of the truth and who think that godliness is a means to financial gain.
6But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. 9People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. 10For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.
11But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness (acting in accord with divine or moral law : free from guilt or sin), godliness (god-like) , faith, love, endurance and gentleness. 12Fight the good fight of the faith."
Share thoughts on how I felt ‘this must be it’ and how God molded that into an emphasis on gentleness. Specifically...fighting with gentleness.
As I pondered the 2 points we are going to be looking at I had a moment of reality. Do you ever have those moments when God gives you the opportunity see something in it’s full perspective? 20/20 I had one of those moments. It was humbling - it was very dramatic for me. God allowed me to see, in a flash, how much he has changed me in some areas in my life and as I stood there pondering these changes, He spoke very gently to my heart and said, ‘You are going to share a testimony you didn’t even know you had.’ Our testimony = our story
Revelation 12:10b-11 tells us....
For the accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. 11 They overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony;
So many times I’ve heard people say, “I don’t have a good testimony - I don’t have anything interesting to say.” Expand
Testimony is simply the story of our life or of specific events (in the short term or long term) in our lives. And the beautiful thing about sharing our testimony is that you never know what God is going to do with it. But the Bible is clear that ‘the word of our testimony’ is what overcomes the power of Satan in our lives and in the lives of others. Our testimony injects hope, faith, endurance and the truth of God’s promises or His faithfulness into the lives of those around us and encourages us to keep going and growing in Christ. So when God said to me ‘You are going to share a testimony you didn’t even know you had.’ I knew exactly what He meant. Because when it comes to fighting with gentleness, this has been a huge process of repentance, restoration and change in my life. And I’ll tell you right now that I have not fully arrived but as that old cigarette commercial says ‘I’ve come a long way baby’. And so when I talk about the things I am going to talk about today I speak from experience. I share with you a history of behavior that is embarrassing, and frankly, shameful to me. But I rejoice in the journey that God has lead me on and the renewal he has done in my life in regards to fighting with gentleness.
When you are in deep relationship with others you will argue......period. I’m not talking about knock down drag outs. I’m saying there will be times that you don’t agree with one another and you will disagree with enough conviction that you’ll feel you need to defend/explain yourself, or to attempt to change someone else’s mind.
You will argue for a variety of reasons - and you will do this because that’s what people who are in deep relationship do - occasionally. It’s just gonna happen. Arguing is not bad. Disagreeing with someone or having them disagree with you is not bad. HOW you argue is where things can turn bad. Your method of argument is powerful in determining the outcome of your argument. By outcome I don’t mean who wins. I mean will you and the other individual walk away with a greater respect and trust for one another or will you emotionally and/or spiritually limp away? If we truly love those in our lives we must be committed to learn and put into practice methods of arguing that are productive.
First point that God brought to my mind earlier this week and that hind sight reminds me it’s a road I’ve walked...
Two points
1. Learn to motivate instead of manipulate
motivation is stemmed by logical discussion or heartfelt desire whereas manipulation is stemmed by the need to be right or get what you want
KEY: when you are arguing with someone do your words influence their emotions or their minds?
An argument that is conducted in a God honoring way will communicate mutual respect even in the midst of the debate. Are your words communicating that what your have to say is important to you and that you love the other individual enough that you want them to understand why you think or feel the way you do? Or are your words failing to communicate and simply resulting in an emotional outpouring on your part or drawing an emotional response from the person your talking to? Ask yourself:
Can the person you are arguing with truly discern the purpose behind what your saying or is the purpose of the argument lost in the emotion of the moment?
2. Lower your voice, I can’t hear you.
sounds strange
When we arguing and we get to the place where we are just yelling, we are not being heard...period.
Demonstrate
How do I do it differently?
1. Check your motives
2. Check your voice
3. Check your volume
4. Check your self
5. Check your temper
An argument conducted in a God honoring way, that has a purpose, is okay. In fact it’s good. We learn about each other and from each other when we argue in the right way because these discussions become more about a passionate exchange of who we are and what is important to us than a yelling match. And argument based on emotions, or winning, or releasing frustration/anger is highly destructive. It tears at the essence of what a healthy relationship is founded on and that is trust, respect, love.
If you have been arguing in this destructive fashion and you want to purpose to change that behavior, there are some things you have to do as soon as you have the opportunity.
1. Confess to the person that you argue destructively with. Help them to see that you recognize and take responsibility for your actions. (Don’t hold them to the same standards you are holding yourself to!)
2. Repent/Renounce - turn away from
Proverbs 28:13 (New International Version)
13 He who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.
3. Make a game plan
4. Forgive yourself and the other individual
5. Confess your behavior to a trusted confidant
James 5:16 (New International Version)
16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
6. Pray
Prayer:
Lord, I believe that what you’ve revealed to us today, by your Word and by your Spirit, are principles that are to change our lives. Your Word tells us that the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy but you come to bring abundant life. I ask you Lord today to reach out to each individual in this room who sees themselves reflected in this message. Show us where our arguments deviate from your character. Show us where our behavior reaps destruction in our lives and in the lives of those we love. Lord let your Spirit flow in this place. Let your forgiveness rest on us as we confess to you that we have sinned when we have used our words in hurtful ways or for personal gain. Thank you Lord that you are a forgiving God. Thank you Lord that we don’t have to learn on our own how to change our ways but that, if we invite you into this process, you will be with us every step of the way. Cause us to be sensitive to your Spirit, that when our motives or words get out of step, that we will feel the tug of your Spirit cautioning us stop before we sin. Thank you that living according to your principles brings us great satisfaction in our lives and in our relationships.
Amen
Sunday, December 31, 2006
GETTING FOCUS* - "Laying the Foundation"
‘if we see what God sees, we’ll do what God says’
Today we're going to look at "Laying the Foundation" for the new year - what better way than to look at a summary of Nehemiah's life and look at eight characteristics of the man himself.
The first study we did as we started through this book, I said that the foundation of leadership is character nor charisma. You don't have to be a charismatic, bubbly, over energetic person to be a leader. What you do have to have is character. I want to pull out from the life of Nehemiah what I see as the eight characteristics of great leaders.
these are things we want to build into our lives in order to be effective.
1. COMPASSION
Nehemiah really cared about people. You don't get four verses into the book of Nehemiah and you're confronted with his compassion. Nehemiah 1:4 "When I heard these things [that the walls of Jerusalem were broken down and the gates had been burned by fire] I sat down and I wept and for some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the Lord."
Nehemiah had it made. He was cupbearer to the king of Persia. He was like the Prime Minister, a high ranking assistant. He had a very cushy job. He had everything he could ever want. Jerusalem is a million miles away as far as he's concerned. It's a foreign country; he's never seen it. He cares about the problems in Jerusalem and he gets concerned. He didn't have to be concerned. He was living on Easy Street. Why get upset? Everything was easy for him. But Nehemiah cared. He was a man of compassion and he saw that the people were having a tough time because their walls were torn down. Their city was in
destruction.
Isn't it true, when things are going good for you it's easy to forget that most of the people in the world are hurting? I become oblivious to the fact that most of the people in the world are in pain -- physical, emotional, relational. They're having difficult times. Particularly living in the ‘Burbs’.
Nehemiah was a man of compassion. Love is the foundation of Christ-centered life. Examples:
Nehemiah 5. Nehemiah's reaction to injustice. The poor had given four complains: food shortages, our homes are over mortgaged, interest rates are high and taxes are high, we have to sell our children into slavery just to pay our bills. Nehemiah heard about how these fat cats were ripping off the poor while they were rebuilding the wall. His reaction 5:6 "When I heard their outcry to these charges I was very angry."
Can anger ever be a loving reaction? You bet. Sometimes if you're not angry you're not loving. We need to be angry at sin. We need to be angry when people are hurt by other people. There is a righteous indignation there. Nehemiah got angry. That's evidence of his compassion for people.
Nehemiah was a man of compassion.
The law of leadership is that People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. As a leader the bottom line is love. Do you love people? Do you care about people? Leadership without love will just become manipulation.
2. CONTEMPLATION
Great leaders instinctively know that they need to balance the time that they spend with people, leading them, with time alone with God. They need a time of contemplation. The effectiveness of our leadership - to lead in life - is determined by our private life. The two go together. Nehemiah was a man of prayer.
Nine times in this very short book, Nehemiah prays. He is a man of prayer. He is a man of contemplation. Every decision he had to make, every crisis he had to face, every criticism he received he prayed about it. In chapter one is one of the great prayers of the Bible. I encourage you to study it. 1:5 "Then I said, `O God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those that love him and obey his commands, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open to hear the prayer your servant is praying before you day and night for your servants, the people of Israel.'" He prayed day and night.
Another example was Nehemiah 2 -- the midnight ride. Remember when he went to Jerusalem. It says he sat in his room for about three days and when no one was looking, he got on his horse, kind of like Paul Revere, and road around the city, checked it all out and saw that it had been defeated and destroyed. What was he doing all during that time? He was contemplating, praying, surveying, talking to the Lord. He was going over, in his mind, what was going on.
Great leaders know that they have to spend time alone because of the time they spend in public all the time. 5:6 "When I heard the outcry of the poor and these charges, I was very angry. I pondered them in my mind [underline this] Then I accused the nobles and the officials." He said, I put my mind in gear before I started activating my mouth. I am a man of contemplation. He kept his cool. He waits for perspective: "God, what do You want me to say?"
Do you ever speak without thinking? One of the laws of leadership that we have to learn is that we get ourselves in trouble when we speak before we think. Great leaders contemplate. He said I pondered what I was going to say.
Nehemiah is a man of compassion; he cares about people.
He's a man of contemplation; he spends time in prayer and in thought.
3. CHEERFULNESS
He's a positive guy, upbeat, optimistic. He has a positive attitude. Do you like to follow a grouch? No. Would you rather follow somebody with a positive attitude? Nehemiah was evidently a very cheerful, positive person.
Nehemiah 2;1 "In the month of Nisan, the twentieth year of Artaxeres, when the wine was brought forth, I took the wine and gave it to the king I had not been sad in his presence before." Nehemiah has been serving this guy all of his life and this is the first time he went in with a frown, a down attitude. He had always been cheerful, upbeat. He didn't go in and lay his problems on the king.
Leaders are to be encouragers, not discourages. The job of leadership is to give people a lift not to let them down. This is why cheerfulness is an important characteristic. If you want to be a leader, then you're going to have to work on this. Some of you by nature are not naturally cheerful. Some people get up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord!" Others getup and say, "Good Lord! It's morning!" Some of you are just not naturally cheerful. But you can work on it. You can develop it. I would encourage you, if you want to be a leader, practice smiling. (Maxwell smile story)
How do you be a cheerful leader when you work with the kind of people you work with? How do you be a cheerful when you're tired and worn out?
Nehemiah 8 is the secret of Nehemiah's strength. He says it in a simple phrase. "This day is sacred to the Lord. Do not grieve for the joy of the Lord is your strength." That's how Nehemiah was cheerful in spite of all the opposition he had. Joy is different from happiness. Happiness depends on happenings. Joy is internal. It is not based on circumstances. You can have joy in the midst of tragedy. You can have joy when you're absolutely fatigued. "The joy of the Lord is my strength."
Nehemiah is compassionate, he's contemplative, he's cheerful.
4. CONCENTRATION
Nehemiah always focused on his goal. He has the ability to maintain his focus in the middle of a project. He doesn't worry about other things and distractions. There are examples in chapters 2 and 3. In chapter 2, Nehemiah anticipates the problems he's going to have. He knows he'll need timber so he asks for timber. He know he'll need protection on his trip to Jerusalem, so he asks in advance for a royal passport. He'll need a place to live so he asked for it in advance. He had obviously thought it out in advance. He was concentrating on what he needed to have.
One of the key differences between leading and following is that leaders are always thinking of the future, further out ahead of everybody else. They're trying to see the problems in advance, anticipate them, and have a solution there by the time you get there. That's a mark of leadership.
Chapter 3, He organizes the work. He's very focused.
I think the best example of how Nehemiah concentrated is how he handled distractions from the opposition. Chapter 6:2 & 3 "Sanballat and Geshem sent me this message, `Come let us meet together on the plain of Ono.' But they were scheming to harm me. So I sent messengers to them with this reply. `I am carrying on a great project and I cannot go down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you?' Four times they sent me the same message and each time I gave them the same answer." He knows these guys are trying to distract him. He's trying to build a wall and the opposition says, Why don't you come down here and have a peace party? Four times they say, come down to Ono and we'll talk. He says, no, I'm not going to be distracted. I'm concentrating on what I need to do. This is a mark of leadership: the ability to focus on what needs to be done and not be distracted. He wouldn't allow anything to delay its completion.
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. That is the principle of concentration. That's a mark of leadership. Paul said, "this one thing I do"... not "these forty things I dabble in." Light when it is focused has tremendous power; it becomes a laser. But light diffused has now power at all. The more focused your life is -- the more concentrated your life is ‑- the more effective it is. That's a characteristic of great leaders -- concentration, the ability to focus.
5. CREATIVITY
The fifth characteristic of great leaders, as we look at Nehemiah's life is Creativity. Nehemiah was a very creative person. The way he approached his problems is fascinating to me. Creativity, people think, is something you're born with -- a predisposition. But Creativity is something that can be developed; it's a skill. It's simply a way of thinking.
This is something I am continually developing in every area of my life - in my marriage, developing creativity, you know what my wife appreciates that! Every yr. I take care of the plans for our anniv. - I take care of everything. Each yr. I ponder, think about another creative way to express to my wife how much our anniv. means to me. I have to work at it!
All of us this upcoming year are going to face new challenges and new challenges require new solutions; a lot of times the same old ways just don't work.
Examples of Nehemiah being a creative problem solver.
Chapter 4. The situation: Those who opposed the rebuilding of the wall from outside said, "We're going to come and attack you while you're trying to build the wall." v. 13 "Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall's exposed places posting them by families with their swords and their spears and bows." He divided them by families and put them by their own house to build their portion of the wall closest to their own house. v. 14-18 "The Lord is great and awesome. Fight for your brother and wives and sons and daughters... From that day on half of the men did the work while the other half were equipped with spears and shields and bows and armors." He has a creative work shift.
He's taking a creative response to the situation. They are all out working on the wall and the enemy says, We're going to come while you're working on the wall and not prepared for battle and kill you all. Nehemiah says: Step one, everybody works by their own house and with your own family. That motivates you to do your best job because if you're building the wall by your own house it will be stronger than if you're building the wall by somebody else's house. You're going to really reinforce the wall by your own house. That's the principle of ownership and delegation.
Also, working as a family unit they will support each other. It's also more efficient -- if you're right by your house you don't have to walk all the way across the city to eat lunch.
He was being creative. Half of the crowd built the wall while the other half stood guard with swords and spears. Then they'd shift. These are creative solutions to the difficult problem he faced. If life gives you a lemon, you make lemonade.
6. COURAGE
When you think of all that Nehemiah went through he was a very courageous person. Would you do what he did? Leave a well paying, safe, secure job at the peak of your career and ministry in your own country to go to a country you've never been to and build something you've never been trained to build? Nehemiah was not a contractor. As far as we know he'd never lifted a hammer or put a brick in place in his life. He was a cupbearer -- the wine taster for the king -- a butler. So here's this butler saying I'm going to go to a foreign country and supervise a construction project of building a wall around a city. He had no preparation for that. That took courage. He said, I'm going to do what God called me to do.
We have three examples of courage in Nehemiah. Nehemiah 2:2 "I'd never been sad in the king's presence before. So when the king asked me `Why do your face look so sad and you're not ill? This can be nothing but sadness of heart.' I was very much afraid but [circle this] I said to the king `May the king live forever! Why should not my face look sad when the city where my fathers are buried lies in ruins and the gates have been destroyed by fire.' The king says, `What is it you want?' Then I prayed to the God of heaven and answered the king, `If it pleases the king and your servant has found favor in his sight, let him send me to the city of Judah where my fathers are buried so I can rebuild it.'
In those days when a person came into the presence of the king to make a request, if the request was denied it meant automatic execution of the person. The king, rejecting your request, meant that the king was rejecting you. And if the king rejected you then you had no use in the kingdom and you were immediately executed. No wonder Nehemiah is scared to death. He's depressed over Jerusalem being destroyed and the king says "What's up? You've been happy all the time you've been serving me now you're sad." Nehemiah said, "I was afraid but I said..." Courage is when only you and God know you're afraid. Courage is not the absence of fear; courage is moving ahead in spite of your fear. Nehemiah said, "I was afraid" and he knew he was taking his life into his hands and it was risky to ask the king's permission to leave his service and go to a foreign country to rebuild the wall of a nation that had been an enemy. He also asked for timber and bricks for the wall and the horses to carry him there and a house to live in.
Another example: 4:14 when the enemy came and said they were going to attack "I looked things over and stood up and said to the nobles and officials and the rest of them, `Don't be afraid of them. Remember the Lord is great and awesome. Fight [circle this] for your brothers, your sons, your daughters and wives." Nehemiah had never led an army in his life. He'd never fought in a battle. But he had courage to do what God had told him to do.
5:7-13 when he confronted the political corruption is another example.
What is courage? Courage is really another word for faith. Being willing to risk, being willing to step out on faith. That's what Nehemiah did. If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat. You've got to take a risk. You've got to take a step out in faith.
To be people who live by FAITH!
"Ife we see what God sees, we'll do what God says"
7. CLEAR CONSCIOUS
Nehemiah was a man of integrity. He handled success very well. Most of us handle failure better than we handle success. Nehemiah knew how to handle success. He was a man of integrity.
One of my favorite passages is in chapter 5:14-19, "In the past the earlier governors, those preceding me, placed a heavy burden on the people, they took 40 shekels of silver from them in addition to food and wine [heavy taxation of the people] and their assistants also lorded it over the people. But out of reverence for God I didn't act like that. I devoted myself to the work of the wall..." Nehemiah had been made the governor of this area by Artaxerses, the king of Persia and the most powerful man at this time. That made Nehemiah the most powerful man in all of Judea. For 12 years Nehemiah could do anything he wanted to do. If he had wanted to he could have been like modern day dictators and amassed a personal fortune. Nehemiah says for 12 years I was the most powerful man in the country. I reported to nobody. I was accountable to nobody. In all of that time, when I could have ripped off my own people, I refused to accept a salary, to tax the people, I personally worked on the wall myself, supervising it. I refused to buy land for profit. I paid my servants to do public work and I personally fed 150 people everyday from my own welfare.
He's saying, For 12 years I was ruler, the leader of this country, there was nobody I was accountable to. Yet in that time, I didn't take any money and I didn't make any money. Do you know many politicians who can say that? This is a man of integrity. This is one of my favorite passages. He says I did not benefit myself from the leadership position I was in. I did not take advantage of the people who were under me. I was a man with a clear conscious.
When you become a success three things go with that: power, prestige, and privilege. The temptation is to abuse all three of those. Nehemiah didn't do it. The key is in v. 15, the last part, "But out of reverence for God I didn't act like that." The other guys did in the past, but Nehemiah didn't act like that. He was a leader with a clear conscious.
8. CONVICTION
Great leaders have strongly held beliefs. An opinion is something you'd argue about; a conviction is something you'd die for. Nehemiah was a man of conviction. He believed very strongly that God had called him to this job and nothing could stop him. Eight different times the opposition tried to keep the wall from being built:
They made fun of him. They laughed, "Those guys over there will never get the wall built." When you're a Christian, one of the first ways people will try to get you to deny your conviction is to make fun of you. If that doesn't work they'll try the second way...
Discouragement. The enemy came and tried to frustrate their plans. Discouragement usually comes at the half way point -- half way done with the project, half way up the mountain.
They tried to make them afraid. We're coming to attack you. We're going to kill you all. That didn't work. Nehemiah had half of the people stand guard.
Discord. They started spreading gossip all among the people. They gossiped about the wall, the leadership, everything. They tried to spread rumors to split up the work of God.
Division. They got a few people to form a little clique, a committee: "We think it ought to be done this way..." Another group: "We think it ought to be done that way..." They tried to cause division to split up the project God was working on. Internal conflict. Up to that time it had all been external.
Distractions. The enemy tried to get the leadership into a peace conference. We may not get them stopped but at least we'll get them slowed down.
Danger. The last attempt was assassination attempts. "We're going to send a hit squad and knock this guy off."
In all of these ways the opposition tried to use to stop the project, Nehemiah kept on doing the will of God. He would not give up. He was persistent. He endured. He was diligent, determined. Why? Because he had conviction. He had the conviction "God called me to do this. God told me to do this and I'm going to do this regardless of what comes against us. Nehemiah was a man of conviction and nothing could get him to quit.
All of us are going to face opposition this year, similar even to what Nehemiah faced -
God is urging us to move forward - don't quit!
He is in it with us!
‘if we see what God sees, we’ll do what God says’
What did Nehemiah base his conviction on? Four things:
1. He had a compelling purpose. In chapter 6 he said, "God has called me to do this great project and I'm not going to come down and talk with you."
2. He had a clear perspective. He had asked God for wisdom.
3. He had a continual prayer. He could see the overview, what God was doing.
4. He had a courageous persistence. He kept on keeping on. I think a good theme verse for Nehemiah would be Galatians 6:9 "Let us not become weary in doing good. For at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."
These eight characteristics we see in Nehemiah's life, I want us to take a little time for self evaluation. Four questions:
1. Which of these character qualities are strongest in your life? Compassion, contemplation, cheerfulness, concentration, creative, courageous, clear conscious, conviction.
2. Which of these character qualities is weakest?
3. Which of these character qualities would you like to develop the most? It's hard to work on something if you haven't clearly identified it.
4. What could you do this week to practice demonstrating this quality? Is there a project you could think of this week, or a situation that you might best demonstrate the quality you want to work on. Force yourself to make an application.
I'm praying that this year will be the year of character development at FOCUS*, that we'll be more like Jesus Christ in character. There are other things out there that are going to pass away, but character is the long haul. Character is what you're going to have in eternity.
Prayer:
Father, this has been an exciting study as we've looked at the life of Nehemiah. He's taught us a lot about leadership, lessons we can apply as leaders in our church, in our home, at work. We're all called to be leaders at different times. May we understand that leadership foundation is character not charisma, not education, not talent but character. Would You this year work on the qualities in our lives? I pray for each person as they've written down the one that they're weakest or the one that they want to work on the most, that You would give them opportunities to develop this, to be more the person You want them to be. Help us all to be leaders for Jesus' sake. We pray this in His name. Amen.
Today we're going to look at "Laying the Foundation" for the new year - what better way than to look at a summary of Nehemiah's life and look at eight characteristics of the man himself.
The first study we did as we started through this book, I said that the foundation of leadership is character nor charisma. You don't have to be a charismatic, bubbly, over energetic person to be a leader. What you do have to have is character. I want to pull out from the life of Nehemiah what I see as the eight characteristics of great leaders.
these are things we want to build into our lives in order to be effective.
1. COMPASSION
Nehemiah really cared about people. You don't get four verses into the book of Nehemiah and you're confronted with his compassion. Nehemiah 1:4 "When I heard these things [that the walls of Jerusalem were broken down and the gates had been burned by fire] I sat down and I wept and for some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the Lord."
Nehemiah had it made. He was cupbearer to the king of Persia. He was like the Prime Minister, a high ranking assistant. He had a very cushy job. He had everything he could ever want. Jerusalem is a million miles away as far as he's concerned. It's a foreign country; he's never seen it. He cares about the problems in Jerusalem and he gets concerned. He didn't have to be concerned. He was living on Easy Street. Why get upset? Everything was easy for him. But Nehemiah cared. He was a man of compassion and he saw that the people were having a tough time because their walls were torn down. Their city was in
destruction.
Isn't it true, when things are going good for you it's easy to forget that most of the people in the world are hurting? I become oblivious to the fact that most of the people in the world are in pain -- physical, emotional, relational. They're having difficult times. Particularly living in the ‘Burbs’.
Nehemiah was a man of compassion. Love is the foundation of Christ-centered life. Examples:
Nehemiah 5. Nehemiah's reaction to injustice. The poor had given four complains: food shortages, our homes are over mortgaged, interest rates are high and taxes are high, we have to sell our children into slavery just to pay our bills. Nehemiah heard about how these fat cats were ripping off the poor while they were rebuilding the wall. His reaction 5:6 "When I heard their outcry to these charges I was very angry."
Can anger ever be a loving reaction? You bet. Sometimes if you're not angry you're not loving. We need to be angry at sin. We need to be angry when people are hurt by other people. There is a righteous indignation there. Nehemiah got angry. That's evidence of his compassion for people.
Nehemiah was a man of compassion.
The law of leadership is that People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care. As a leader the bottom line is love. Do you love people? Do you care about people? Leadership without love will just become manipulation.
2. CONTEMPLATION
Great leaders instinctively know that they need to balance the time that they spend with people, leading them, with time alone with God. They need a time of contemplation. The effectiveness of our leadership - to lead in life - is determined by our private life. The two go together. Nehemiah was a man of prayer.
Nine times in this very short book, Nehemiah prays. He is a man of prayer. He is a man of contemplation. Every decision he had to make, every crisis he had to face, every criticism he received he prayed about it. In chapter one is one of the great prayers of the Bible. I encourage you to study it. 1:5 "Then I said, `O God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those that love him and obey his commands, let your ear be attentive and your eyes open to hear the prayer your servant is praying before you day and night for your servants, the people of Israel.'" He prayed day and night.
Another example was Nehemiah 2 -- the midnight ride. Remember when he went to Jerusalem. It says he sat in his room for about three days and when no one was looking, he got on his horse, kind of like Paul Revere, and road around the city, checked it all out and saw that it had been defeated and destroyed. What was he doing all during that time? He was contemplating, praying, surveying, talking to the Lord. He was going over, in his mind, what was going on.
Great leaders know that they have to spend time alone because of the time they spend in public all the time. 5:6 "When I heard the outcry of the poor and these charges, I was very angry. I pondered them in my mind [underline this] Then I accused the nobles and the officials." He said, I put my mind in gear before I started activating my mouth. I am a man of contemplation. He kept his cool. He waits for perspective: "God, what do You want me to say?"
Do you ever speak without thinking? One of the laws of leadership that we have to learn is that we get ourselves in trouble when we speak before we think. Great leaders contemplate. He said I pondered what I was going to say.
Nehemiah is a man of compassion; he cares about people.
He's a man of contemplation; he spends time in prayer and in thought.
3. CHEERFULNESS
He's a positive guy, upbeat, optimistic. He has a positive attitude. Do you like to follow a grouch? No. Would you rather follow somebody with a positive attitude? Nehemiah was evidently a very cheerful, positive person.
Nehemiah 2;1 "In the month of Nisan, the twentieth year of Artaxeres, when the wine was brought forth, I took the wine and gave it to the king I had not been sad in his presence before." Nehemiah has been serving this guy all of his life and this is the first time he went in with a frown, a down attitude. He had always been cheerful, upbeat. He didn't go in and lay his problems on the king.
Leaders are to be encouragers, not discourages. The job of leadership is to give people a lift not to let them down. This is why cheerfulness is an important characteristic. If you want to be a leader, then you're going to have to work on this. Some of you by nature are not naturally cheerful. Some people get up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord!" Others getup and say, "Good Lord! It's morning!" Some of you are just not naturally cheerful. But you can work on it. You can develop it. I would encourage you, if you want to be a leader, practice smiling. (Maxwell smile story)
How do you be a cheerful leader when you work with the kind of people you work with? How do you be a cheerful when you're tired and worn out?
Nehemiah 8 is the secret of Nehemiah's strength. He says it in a simple phrase. "This day is sacred to the Lord. Do not grieve for the joy of the Lord is your strength." That's how Nehemiah was cheerful in spite of all the opposition he had. Joy is different from happiness. Happiness depends on happenings. Joy is internal. It is not based on circumstances. You can have joy in the midst of tragedy. You can have joy when you're absolutely fatigued. "The joy of the Lord is my strength."
Nehemiah is compassionate, he's contemplative, he's cheerful.
4. CONCENTRATION
Nehemiah always focused on his goal. He has the ability to maintain his focus in the middle of a project. He doesn't worry about other things and distractions. There are examples in chapters 2 and 3. In chapter 2, Nehemiah anticipates the problems he's going to have. He knows he'll need timber so he asks for timber. He know he'll need protection on his trip to Jerusalem, so he asks in advance for a royal passport. He'll need a place to live so he asked for it in advance. He had obviously thought it out in advance. He was concentrating on what he needed to have.
One of the key differences between leading and following is that leaders are always thinking of the future, further out ahead of everybody else. They're trying to see the problems in advance, anticipate them, and have a solution there by the time you get there. That's a mark of leadership.
Chapter 3, He organizes the work. He's very focused.
I think the best example of how Nehemiah concentrated is how he handled distractions from the opposition. Chapter 6:2 & 3 "Sanballat and Geshem sent me this message, `Come let us meet together on the plain of Ono.' But they were scheming to harm me. So I sent messengers to them with this reply. `I am carrying on a great project and I cannot go down. Why should the work stop while I leave it and go down to you?' Four times they sent me the same message and each time I gave them the same answer." He knows these guys are trying to distract him. He's trying to build a wall and the opposition says, Why don't you come down here and have a peace party? Four times they say, come down to Ono and we'll talk. He says, no, I'm not going to be distracted. I'm concentrating on what I need to do. This is a mark of leadership: the ability to focus on what needs to be done and not be distracted. He wouldn't allow anything to delay its completion.
The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing. That is the principle of concentration. That's a mark of leadership. Paul said, "this one thing I do"... not "these forty things I dabble in." Light when it is focused has tremendous power; it becomes a laser. But light diffused has now power at all. The more focused your life is -- the more concentrated your life is ‑- the more effective it is. That's a characteristic of great leaders -- concentration, the ability to focus.
5. CREATIVITY
The fifth characteristic of great leaders, as we look at Nehemiah's life is Creativity. Nehemiah was a very creative person. The way he approached his problems is fascinating to me. Creativity, people think, is something you're born with -- a predisposition. But Creativity is something that can be developed; it's a skill. It's simply a way of thinking.
This is something I am continually developing in every area of my life - in my marriage, developing creativity, you know what my wife appreciates that! Every yr. I take care of the plans for our anniv. - I take care of everything. Each yr. I ponder, think about another creative way to express to my wife how much our anniv. means to me. I have to work at it!
All of us this upcoming year are going to face new challenges and new challenges require new solutions; a lot of times the same old ways just don't work.
Examples of Nehemiah being a creative problem solver.
Chapter 4. The situation: Those who opposed the rebuilding of the wall from outside said, "We're going to come and attack you while you're trying to build the wall." v. 13 "Therefore I stationed some of the people behind the lowest points of the wall's exposed places posting them by families with their swords and their spears and bows." He divided them by families and put them by their own house to build their portion of the wall closest to their own house. v. 14-18 "The Lord is great and awesome. Fight for your brother and wives and sons and daughters... From that day on half of the men did the work while the other half were equipped with spears and shields and bows and armors." He has a creative work shift.
He's taking a creative response to the situation. They are all out working on the wall and the enemy says, We're going to come while you're working on the wall and not prepared for battle and kill you all. Nehemiah says: Step one, everybody works by their own house and with your own family. That motivates you to do your best job because if you're building the wall by your own house it will be stronger than if you're building the wall by somebody else's house. You're going to really reinforce the wall by your own house. That's the principle of ownership and delegation.
Also, working as a family unit they will support each other. It's also more efficient -- if you're right by your house you don't have to walk all the way across the city to eat lunch.
He was being creative. Half of the crowd built the wall while the other half stood guard with swords and spears. Then they'd shift. These are creative solutions to the difficult problem he faced. If life gives you a lemon, you make lemonade.
6. COURAGE
When you think of all that Nehemiah went through he was a very courageous person. Would you do what he did? Leave a well paying, safe, secure job at the peak of your career and ministry in your own country to go to a country you've never been to and build something you've never been trained to build? Nehemiah was not a contractor. As far as we know he'd never lifted a hammer or put a brick in place in his life. He was a cupbearer -- the wine taster for the king -- a butler. So here's this butler saying I'm going to go to a foreign country and supervise a construction project of building a wall around a city. He had no preparation for that. That took courage. He said, I'm going to do what God called me to do.
We have three examples of courage in Nehemiah. Nehemiah 2:2 "I'd never been sad in the king's presence before. So when the king asked me `Why do your face look so sad and you're not ill? This can be nothing but sadness of heart.' I was very much afraid but [circle this] I said to the king `May the king live forever! Why should not my face look sad when the city where my fathers are buried lies in ruins and the gates have been destroyed by fire.' The king says, `What is it you want?' Then I prayed to the God of heaven and answered the king, `If it pleases the king and your servant has found favor in his sight, let him send me to the city of Judah where my fathers are buried so I can rebuild it.'
In those days when a person came into the presence of the king to make a request, if the request was denied it meant automatic execution of the person. The king, rejecting your request, meant that the king was rejecting you. And if the king rejected you then you had no use in the kingdom and you were immediately executed. No wonder Nehemiah is scared to death. He's depressed over Jerusalem being destroyed and the king says "What's up? You've been happy all the time you've been serving me now you're sad." Nehemiah said, "I was afraid but I said..." Courage is when only you and God know you're afraid. Courage is not the absence of fear; courage is moving ahead in spite of your fear. Nehemiah said, "I was afraid" and he knew he was taking his life into his hands and it was risky to ask the king's permission to leave his service and go to a foreign country to rebuild the wall of a nation that had been an enemy. He also asked for timber and bricks for the wall and the horses to carry him there and a house to live in.
Another example: 4:14 when the enemy came and said they were going to attack "I looked things over and stood up and said to the nobles and officials and the rest of them, `Don't be afraid of them. Remember the Lord is great and awesome. Fight [circle this] for your brothers, your sons, your daughters and wives." Nehemiah had never led an army in his life. He'd never fought in a battle. But he had courage to do what God had told him to do.
5:7-13 when he confronted the political corruption is another example.
What is courage? Courage is really another word for faith. Being willing to risk, being willing to step out on faith. That's what Nehemiah did. If you want to walk on water you've got to get out of the boat. You've got to take a risk. You've got to take a step out in faith.
To be people who live by FAITH!
"Ife we see what God sees, we'll do what God says"
7. CLEAR CONSCIOUS
Nehemiah was a man of integrity. He handled success very well. Most of us handle failure better than we handle success. Nehemiah knew how to handle success. He was a man of integrity.
One of my favorite passages is in chapter 5:14-19, "In the past the earlier governors, those preceding me, placed a heavy burden on the people, they took 40 shekels of silver from them in addition to food and wine [heavy taxation of the people] and their assistants also lorded it over the people. But out of reverence for God I didn't act like that. I devoted myself to the work of the wall..." Nehemiah had been made the governor of this area by Artaxerses, the king of Persia and the most powerful man at this time. That made Nehemiah the most powerful man in all of Judea. For 12 years Nehemiah could do anything he wanted to do. If he had wanted to he could have been like modern day dictators and amassed a personal fortune. Nehemiah says for 12 years I was the most powerful man in the country. I reported to nobody. I was accountable to nobody. In all of that time, when I could have ripped off my own people, I refused to accept a salary, to tax the people, I personally worked on the wall myself, supervising it. I refused to buy land for profit. I paid my servants to do public work and I personally fed 150 people everyday from my own welfare.
He's saying, For 12 years I was ruler, the leader of this country, there was nobody I was accountable to. Yet in that time, I didn't take any money and I didn't make any money. Do you know many politicians who can say that? This is a man of integrity. This is one of my favorite passages. He says I did not benefit myself from the leadership position I was in. I did not take advantage of the people who were under me. I was a man with a clear conscious.
When you become a success three things go with that: power, prestige, and privilege. The temptation is to abuse all three of those. Nehemiah didn't do it. The key is in v. 15, the last part, "But out of reverence for God I didn't act like that." The other guys did in the past, but Nehemiah didn't act like that. He was a leader with a clear conscious.
8. CONVICTION
Great leaders have strongly held beliefs. An opinion is something you'd argue about; a conviction is something you'd die for. Nehemiah was a man of conviction. He believed very strongly that God had called him to this job and nothing could stop him. Eight different times the opposition tried to keep the wall from being built:
They made fun of him. They laughed, "Those guys over there will never get the wall built." When you're a Christian, one of the first ways people will try to get you to deny your conviction is to make fun of you. If that doesn't work they'll try the second way...
Discouragement. The enemy came and tried to frustrate their plans. Discouragement usually comes at the half way point -- half way done with the project, half way up the mountain.
They tried to make them afraid. We're coming to attack you. We're going to kill you all. That didn't work. Nehemiah had half of the people stand guard.
Discord. They started spreading gossip all among the people. They gossiped about the wall, the leadership, everything. They tried to spread rumors to split up the work of God.
Division. They got a few people to form a little clique, a committee: "We think it ought to be done this way..." Another group: "We think it ought to be done that way..." They tried to cause division to split up the project God was working on. Internal conflict. Up to that time it had all been external.
Distractions. The enemy tried to get the leadership into a peace conference. We may not get them stopped but at least we'll get them slowed down.
Danger. The last attempt was assassination attempts. "We're going to send a hit squad and knock this guy off."
In all of these ways the opposition tried to use to stop the project, Nehemiah kept on doing the will of God. He would not give up. He was persistent. He endured. He was diligent, determined. Why? Because he had conviction. He had the conviction "God called me to do this. God told me to do this and I'm going to do this regardless of what comes against us. Nehemiah was a man of conviction and nothing could get him to quit.
All of us are going to face opposition this year, similar even to what Nehemiah faced -
God is urging us to move forward - don't quit!
He is in it with us!
‘if we see what God sees, we’ll do what God says’
What did Nehemiah base his conviction on? Four things:
1. He had a compelling purpose. In chapter 6 he said, "God has called me to do this great project and I'm not going to come down and talk with you."
2. He had a clear perspective. He had asked God for wisdom.
3. He had a continual prayer. He could see the overview, what God was doing.
4. He had a courageous persistence. He kept on keeping on. I think a good theme verse for Nehemiah would be Galatians 6:9 "Let us not become weary in doing good. For at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."
These eight characteristics we see in Nehemiah's life, I want us to take a little time for self evaluation. Four questions:
1. Which of these character qualities are strongest in your life? Compassion, contemplation, cheerfulness, concentration, creative, courageous, clear conscious, conviction.
2. Which of these character qualities is weakest?
3. Which of these character qualities would you like to develop the most? It's hard to work on something if you haven't clearly identified it.
4. What could you do this week to practice demonstrating this quality? Is there a project you could think of this week, or a situation that you might best demonstrate the quality you want to work on. Force yourself to make an application.
I'm praying that this year will be the year of character development at FOCUS*, that we'll be more like Jesus Christ in character. There are other things out there that are going to pass away, but character is the long haul. Character is what you're going to have in eternity.
Prayer:
Father, this has been an exciting study as we've looked at the life of Nehemiah. He's taught us a lot about leadership, lessons we can apply as leaders in our church, in our home, at work. We're all called to be leaders at different times. May we understand that leadership foundation is character not charisma, not education, not talent but character. Would You this year work on the qualities in our lives? I pray for each person as they've written down the one that they're weakest or the one that they want to work on the most, that You would give them opportunities to develop this, to be more the person You want them to be. Help us all to be leaders for Jesus' sake. We pray this in His name. Amen.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)